here's something i grabbed from eddie's blog..
it's long burt it's reali meaningful..
do spend the effort n a short 3 min to read it kies?

Life's Paradoxes; Paradox of Our Times
borrowed from Pootchkee

We have taller buildings, but shorter tempers; wider freeways,
but narrower viewpoints; we spend more, but have less;
we buy more, but enjoy it less.

We have bigger houses and smaller families; more conveniences,
but less time; we have more degrees, but less common sense;
more knowledge, but less judgment; more experts,
but more problems; more medicine, but less wellness.

We spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast,
get too angry too quickly, stay up too late, get up too tired,
read too seldom, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom.

We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values.

We talk too much, love too seldom and lie too often.

We've learned how to make a living, but not a life;
we've added years to life, not life to years.

We build more computers to hold more information,
to produce more copies than ever, but have less communication;
we've become long on quantity, but short on quality.

We've been all the way to the moon and back,
but have trouble crossing the street to meet the new neighbor.

We've conquered outer space, but not inner space;
we've done larger things, but not better things;
we've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul;
we've split the atom, but not our prejudice; we write more,
but learn less; plan more, but accomplish less.

We've learned to rush, but not to wait; we have higher incomes;
but lower morals; more food but less appeasement;
more acquaintances, but fewer friends;
more effort but less success.

These are the time of fast foods and slow digestion;
tall men and short character;
steep profits, and shallow relationships.

These are the times of world peace, but domestic warfare;
more leisure and less fun; more kinds of food, but less nutrition.
These are days of two incomes, but more divorce;
of fancier houses, but broken homes.

These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers,
throwaway morality, one-night stands, overweight bodies,
and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill.

It is a time when there is much in the show window,
and nothing in the stockroom.

Indeed it's all true. Think about it...read it again.
~Anonymous

posted by shunqiang at 8:32 AM

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
yeah i know i said i wun be blogging till after a's
burt jux suddenly felt like saying something

it's the start of sept term break
burt prelims are coming.
as soon as school reopens
our prelims start
and i guess all jc kids noe the kind of life already.
hms..............
....
........
........................
(-_______-)
damn.
suddenly im speechless again.
i think i mux be suffering from the lack-of-sleep-syndrome.

anyway.
today we have a history mock prelim exam
despite the fact tat today is teacher's day celebrations.
burt after the paper,
we were supposed to stay back n go thru the paper
burt me n my sisters grabbed the answer key n scooted off.
lols..
well..
i needed a getaway before i start mugging again la.
so i went shopping n bought tons of things
n my mum took me out for a sumptuous dinner at a restaurant along katong
thanks mummy, i noe u wanted to give me a time away from studying =)

oh ya!
im SO disappointed can!
suay pok!!!!
tat day me n qin went parkway parade shopping
den we saw tis damn pretty pencil case n music box
today i went back to buy
burt the pencil case was OUT OF STOCK
and it will onli replenish stocks in mid sept.
(-_________-)
AND
i wanted to buy the music box (there're a lot of different songs)
burt i wanted Canon In D
but it's OUT OF STOCK TOO.
kns.
the pencil case n music box is SO.DAMN.PRETTY. can!
the pencil case is red color de..like a school bus
then gort pandas sitting "inside" the bus
i love pandas duh!!
and the "bus" can move!!!!!
(T~T)
then for the music box
u have to manually turn it for it to play
so it's unlike those tat u wind it up,
it wun be damaged so easily.
and the Canon In D sounded soooooooooooo heavenly!
(T~~~~~~~~~T)
and there was also the "You Are My Sunshine" music box
it's very sweet too, and i loved it.
burt tat one..
hahas...

oh well.
bad luck i guess.
=(

alrights..
enuff crapping..
i wan go zzz already.
finally it's term break
althou need to study
burt at least i get more sleep.
tatas..
*snores*-

monday econs test
tues history lect test
wed hist & econs STAR test
fri c.lit & hist test
in other words
everyday test test test.
mug mug mug.
study study study.
i ought to be studying now.
nxt tues c.lit test on song ci
nxt fri hist mock exam paper (full).
burt jux wanna come here to say
i wun be blogging from now on till after the end of A's.
reali gort no time la.
so ya.
and to all my frens out there~
my darlings..peeps of srjc..and fangyu et pearl oli huimin hinfan n etc
all the best lo!
jiayou..study hard=))

love holidays!!!
*muack muack muack muack*
great week no school =))
enjoying the temporary period of rest
and prays hard tat monday comes later.
(O.O)

do you know what it feels like,
loving someone that's in a rush to throw you away?

baby since you walked away,
i miss you,
i miss you more n more each day.
tell me do you think about me,
cux i think about u all the time
a million miles just stand between us
burt i wont stop until u're mine.

~ lyrics from songs by Enrique Iglesias ~

went meridian pool with the girls after sch today
was allowed to wear civilian to sch hahas..
kinda..uncomfortable actuali cux the weather sucks.
had a great time.
very funny n "entertaining" cux huiting keep disturbing us.
(-_______-)||
then qinqin abit stern when teaching us lols..
(>.<)! then i keep worrying my eyeliner would smudge cux i was using non-waterproof. gr. damn troublesome.

currently : emo-ing
life's fallacious.
would you still believe in life?

i'd upload the photos taken today when im free =))

GASP!
i FORGET there's econs revision timed practice
damn damn damn
gotta run mug AGAIN.
ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!
=(

went school early for history test today..
after tat went eat mc breakfast with ah qin, wenwen n jiajia
then went ps with wenwen to fix her mp3
jiajia n qin gort things on so left us two.
ting went home meet her mum..
den the person say wen's mp3 spoil..
so we tried our luck at marina's creative again..
burt still spoil =((
then me n wenwen saw monopoly lo!
so cute hahas
he gave us fake 10000 bills
then we oso saw the simpons standboard
and took photos with the monpoly n standboard.
then i was wondering how the person see me in his monopoly suit
then i kept staring at him(i assume is a him) to try finding the "peephole"
burt cannort find LOLS.
the monopoly guy mux be feeling weird why i stare at him lidat
like stalker HAHAHAS..
after tat i went hospital visit my gran..
then went for dinner with my parents
we ate at BaliThai @ velocity
and i ate tom yum despite being sick
LOLS!
was sneezing the whole day..runny nose sorethroat n slight cough.
grrr..
i reckoned i sneezed for at least 20 times today.
(-_____-)||
feeling very uncomfortable
burt still couldnt resist the seafood tom yum hahas!
YUMMY =))

now listening to the radio broadcast by siokwen n hinfan's fren
it's his last broadcast..
first time listening so sad..
=((
all the best dixon!
hope next time can hear your broadcast again.
=))

here's the photo we took..



~siokwen with the simpons!~



~me with the simpons!~



~MONOPOLY!! hahas~

went to siokwen's house after school today
super tired de..
been chionging n mugging like mad
so today went crazing arnd with my frens.
we played monopoly at her house.
LOLS!
it's been damn long since we played tat.
like we reali seriously deprived sia.
burt reali too tired to go anywhere..
wanted to go town burt everyone's zzz~~
so we went siokwen's house then nort so tired lo.
now my eyes closing soon.
..........................................................
k la burt today very happy playing with my frens
laugh until like siao.
ytd..
gave up somethings so tat i could concentrate on studies..
or shld i say. i gave up someone.
i wish it was a right choice.
well..
i think i reali gtg slp lers.
night guys.....

ytd talked to eunice ting on msn
hms..very happy la
almost one year nvr tok to this good fren
last time in sec sch she was my best fren sia
burt after go jc..
our character la hahas..so nvr reali contact each other.
we toked bout our current life lo..
then she told me:
"follow ur heart."
should i?
burt i oso duno ward my heart wants.
well..
i have to say thanks to e.t
cux she made me look through some things.



"Big Girls Don't Cry"

Da Da Da Da
The smell of your skin lingers on me now
You're probably on your flight back to your home town
I need some shelter of my own protection baby
To be with myself and center, clarity
Peace, Serenity

[CHORUS:]
I hope you know, I hope you know
That this has nothing to do with you
It's personal, myself and I
We've got some straightenin' out to do
And I'm gonna miss you like a child misses their blanket
But I've got to get a move on with my life
It's time to be a big girl now
And big girls don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry
Don't cry

The path that I'm walking
I must go alone
I must take the baby steps 'til I'm full grown, full grown
Fairytales don't always have a happy ending, do they?
And I foresee the dark ahead if I stay

[CHORUS]

Like the little school mate in the school yard
We'll play jacks and uno cards
I'll be your best friend and you'll be my Valentine
Yes you can hold my hand if you want to
'Cause I want to hold yours too
We'll be playmates and lovers and share our secret worlds
But it's time for me to go home
It's getting late, dark outside
I need to be with myself and center, clarity
Peace, Serenity

[CHORUS]

La Da Da Da Da Da

undeniably.
i miss you.

yer!
so disappointed.
sad liao.
=(
wa if sihui never see my phone
nvr see tat photo
i think i tis life oso wun noe.
sucks.
grrr..
after i see i reali speechless.
siokwen i guess she speechless oso lols.
zaizai tis morning still say
"dun look like leh"
burt i guess if she know she will turn off duh.
maybe.
life's full of surprises. and SHOCKS.
nvm la.
fated.
hahas..

very tired.
chionging history like it's the end of the world
sleep very little..
eyes oso red red ler..
jux now took photo with qinqin..
then wa! my eyes so sore la.
i wan sleep!!!!!!!!!

recieved a msg from fan.
sho happy hahas.
=(
why happy still =( ?
duno leh.
feeling very empty.
when i saw the mail i was like "YAY!"
hahas.
burt only for a sec.
then emo again.
nvm la.
in my depression state..as usual
esp after knowing bout ward sihui said.
damn!
very very depressed lately.
feel like everything's the end.
aiya.
dun care.
maybe one day smth will make me happy?
well.
i hope one day smth happens to make me happy.
i HOPE.

Walk Away
By: Paula Deanda



I'm gonna remember you
You're gonna remember me
I'm gonna remember you
You're gonna remember me

You gonna remember me boo
I'm gonna remember you too
I can't forget all the crazy shhh.. we used to do
You was doing too much
I wasn't doing enough
That's what your friends are saying
You got a man anyway
I can't explain it neither
I ain't never wanna leave ya
Hell ya its hard to walk away when I see ya
When I see ya I remember the day
You put your shoes on and moved on
Before I could say

I saw you with your new girl just yesterday
And I feel that I must confess
Even though it kills me to have to say
I'll admit that I was impressed
Physically just short of perfection
Gotta commend you on your selection
Though I know I shouldn't be concerned
In the back of my mind
I can't help but question
Does she rub your feet
When you've had a long day
Scratch your scalp
When you take out your braids
Does she know that you like too
Play PS2 till 6 in the morning
Like I do

I can't explain this feeling
I think about it everyday
And even though we've moved on
It gets so hard to walk away
(I'm gonna remember you
You're gonna remember me)
Walk Away, Walk Away
(I'm gonna remember you
You're gonna remember me)

I can't forget how we used to be
Our life from day to day
Hoping maybe you'll come back
And though I tell myself not to be afraid
To move on but it seems I can't
Though a new man has given me attention
It ain't the same as your affection
Though I know I should be content
In the back of my mind
I can't help but question
Does he kiss me on the forehead
Before we play
Show up on my doorstep
(with a bouquet)
Does he call me in the middle of the day
Just to say hey baby I love you
Like you used to

I can't explain this feeling
I think about it everyday
And even though we've moved on
It gets so hard to walk away
(I'm gonna remember you
You're gonna remember me)
Walk Away, Walk Away
(I'm gonna remember you
You're gonna remember me)

I'm Gonna Remember You
Your Gonna Remember Me
The things we did
The way we shared our fantasies
Just you and me
My friend, my love, my family
How did we loose a love that seemed meant to be
Sometimes I kiss her and wish that it was you I'm kissing
Sometimes I miss him and wish that it was you I'm missing
Sometimes I hug her and wish that it was you I was hugging
And I realize how much I'm bugging
I miss you

Walk Away, Walk Away

(I'm Gonna Remember You
Your Gonna Remember Me)

So hard to express this feeling
Cause nobody compares to you
And you know she'll never love you like I do

I can't explain this feeling
I think about it everyday
And even though we've moved on
It gets so hard to walk away

(I'm gonna remember you
You're gonna remember me)

Walk Away, Walk Away

Remember You

(I'm gonna remember you
You're gonna remember me)

(I'm gonna remember you
You're gonna remember me)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
so sweet tis song?
yeah.
i posted tis song before..
burt decided to post it again.
with lyrics tis time.
cux was talking to siokwen today
and i thought about tis song
yeah.
it's..hais i duno.
it jux kept reminding me.
went makan at mos today..
then tok tok tok with siokwen..
then i realised..
actuali sometimes..things in tis world is reali unpredictable.
it's been YEARS ok.
never tort tat after YEARS it wld be brought up again.
life is reali ... duno. speechless.
i hope.
i oso duno ward im hoping for.
k i mux be so crazy tat i duno ward im toking about.
i jux hope.
to be happy.
ya.
maybe tat's ward im hoping for.
althou i duno how to achieve it.

used a few min and did tis little thing..
cux i rmbred qinqin said she'd love to have smth like tis..
paiseh ar qinqin..
my adobe abit sotsot..
tis's the best i can do ler..
=))

alright!
i'd be back later lo~~
=))

midyr's FINALLY over.
gosh tis is reali difficult..
feeling very very xin ku
and couldnt study well.
i know A'level's gonna be worse.
hais.
i really canort take tis
exams REALLY suck.
im so tired of everything.
i wan to throw away my everything.
i dun wan anything anymore.
i dun think i can handle anything.
im so tired.
can someone give me a break?

alright..
tok about something happy..
after the last shitty history paper ytd
me n ting they all went marina square
went seoul garden makan..
then shop wid qin for her gf's present..
then qin wanted to buy ring for doreen de
burt marina there dun have nice de.
so sweet.
it reminds me of tat time sihui tat ring..
the black one from couple lab
it's so nice..can turn de.
somemore it's BLACK!
hahas.
then i went cut hair lo
my fringe damn long very irritating.
pity fyn wasnt in..she off
sian i like her hairstyling skills.
next time book appointment wid her barhs.
after trimming my hair
wenwen went creative fix her mp3
den we all very tired
in the end we went sitting at "world of sports" (is it?)
hahas..
sit until almost wan fall asleep.
then after retrieving wenwen's mp3 we went home ler.
damn tired cux didnt sleep much the night before.
zZz..

hms..
recently
i begin to have some new thinkings
burt im feeling guilty about it.
am i very selfish n bad?
i think i am.
i keep thinking : "how can i do this?! it's so bad of me"
then i told qinling..
and i asked her "am i very bad?am i very heartless to have such thinkings?"
she told me..
"no..i think it's jux normal.maybe girls are lidat de la.always think too much."
really?is tat so?is it jux normal?
i duno la.
i really duno ward to do.
i think..i've changed.
ya. i did.
and it's nort good?
hais.
who can tell me the answer?
burt i dun dare to do anything lo.
cux im afraid of the ending.
the consequences might be dire.
i think i'd jux pray hard n die la.

chris gaylor..tyson ritter..mike kennerty..nick wheeler!!


nick wheeler~~!!!!

so cute!!
starting to like them recently..
esp nick wheeler
he's so damn cute (>.<)
hahas! bleahs~~

hate studying~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

yeah im back.
i know i should be studying hahas.
burt im reali dying la!!!
was on the phone wid zaizai jux now
damn funny lols
siao one la she.
burt it reali did brighten my day.
so long nvr tok to her ler sobs.
i miss my frens.
=((

toking to desmond on msn now..
glad to know tat he's doin fine
seems like he's very happy in temasek poly
he's drooling over the babes lols.

earlier on..
i talked to fan too..
he's back in hongkong now for the hols
burt he's still mugging there lols..
he's still the same i guess.
still such a nice and gentle guy.
it's been a long time.
i wonder how he's doin?
talking to him
all the memories flooded back..
(huimin if u're reading tis, pls dun anyhow say. dun cry too haha.)
i sdnly recalled the times we had together
we were so young then.
hahas..
the primary school days..
sigh.
i miss huimin oso.
rmbr how we used to make fun of fan?
hahas!
it was so carefree then.
nort like now..
hais.

as pple grow up..
we tend to close our hearts.
cux we've been hurt too many times
we close our hearts to avoid being hurt again.
it's scary.
the innocence's gone
ward's left is selfishness..lies..and heartaches.
im suddenly reminded of winston.
(cux he jux gort online)
hahas.
i cant believe he'd changed SO much.
from tat blurblur innocent boy to lidat.
i wouldnt say he's bad now.
burt duno leh..
i dun like the present him.
he used to be true and sweet.
burt hais.
yeah i know pple change.
it's cruel.
even fan will change.
yeah. i know.
he did changed.
burt..he didnt change much?
or maybe only bcux i duno la.
burt talking to him..
he's still him leh.
after so many years
how can he still be so nice??!!
i think if it's other pple
they'd ignore me already.
after all the things i've done.
i've been so extreme towards him.
it's inconceivable how he can still talk to me so nicely and gently.
is he human? lols.
burt.. im so thankful he still regards me as a fren.
he'll always..ALWAYS be my good fren.
right?
=))
after we all grow up..
minmin.. do u still rmbr?
me.. minmin.. fan.. wileen.. susanna.. liwen.. waikwong.. chinwee..
no matter how old i'd be..
i'll still rmbr the days.
the happy times we had together.
=))

~stolen from qinqin's blog..~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i would give my tomorrows for one yesterday. i know you will too. everyday when time doesn't permit us to stay any longer i leave with only half a soul. because i left the other half with you. it's undescibable.

heart attack kills someone instantly. but a broken heart slowly eats you up.

yes. for once indeed i thank god. not because he brought us together. but because he wrote in my fate, 'you will spend the most memorable times with him and thank me even if i gave you just one day to live.'

and yes, we will be friends. i'll be there. promise.

yea we're still standing strong don't worry.

just wanted to say you're the best thing that ever happened to me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ok i changed the words..i changed the "her" to "him"
tis was a post by qinqin a year ago..
tat's long (o.O)
burt jux came across it and felt tat it's so sweet.
ok gtg back mugging.
later~~
=))

went for camp on fri, 8th june
it was nort bad la
althou nort extremely exciting like the vball girls de
hahas..

bombed fonsus
and he n mingxiang sneaked attack on me
and i was drenched.
(-____-)||
idiot.
me n zarifah bought quite alot of food
and gobbled them up
hahas..

and we went star gazing at the soccer field
then timothy was playing the guitar
with illis and seewan singing..
mingxiang and his darling + xiangqi were sitting on the floor chatting
then me zarifah fonsus n ondreas were lying on the bench
half dozing lols
(we carried the bench there)
and it was damn nice..
=))
after tat tim n seewan went back guitar room slack
den fonsus started playing the guitar
"far away"!!!
and i started singing hahas
(stupid zarifah on the phone wid huda)
den me n david chat for a long...long...time
using canto lols
den fonsus keep disturbing us wid his guitar cux he dun understan a word
(-______-)
den me n david were singing
and heard somebody shouted
"falling star!!!"
(T~T)
me n dave was too busy singing so didnt see
sobsobs..
illis was dozing off, zarifah on the phone
so they didnt see oso
burt it was so sweet la^^
den fonsus n dave carried the bench back
and i rode on it
ahhahahas!
so nice
rocky rocky~~
burt when junsheng came over and wanted to sit on it
i jumped off immediately
fonsus n dave let go immediately oso
heng if nort everyone wld collapse.
LOLS!

den we went to IT room
and they watched "pirates of the carribean"
i watch before so i went out wid illis zarifah n dave to play poker
damn sian
didnt stay up cux dave didnt wake me n illis up
in the end we slept thru while they hang arnd
the classroom tables were damn uncomfortable
den zarifah (who slept beside me)
came nearer n nearer to me while she slept
cux it was cold
(-______-)
i was so scared i'd hit her when i turned la!
damn uncomfortable!
=(

oh ya..
sorry to my sisters..
i was abit in the depression state earlier on.
(>.<)
burt dun worry im ok
im jux emo-ing again hahas.

comp spoil cant update=(
finally get a chance to update now..
so well..
it's the start of holidays!=))

first day of holidays..
-monday 28th May 2007-
went out wid my sisters..
went vivo
ms tan hui ting
heard me wrongly
and made everyone meet at 10.30am instead of 11.30am
(-____-)||
so we all woke up damn early
and ms tan n ms yeo were LATE
in the end me n zaizai went walking arnd first.
...*bish!*
den shushu saw edwin tan
(-____-)||

after huiting n jiajia reached
we all went to buy tickets for pirates of the carribean
den after we makan
we went walking arnd the mall
we went giant and bought food hahas
den went to sit at the merry-go-round outside
hahas!
huiting zaizai n me were on it
den pple were looking
burt it was damn funny lols..
who cares bout other pple looking as long as we enjoyed ourselves?
(^.<) after tat we went daiso and arcade and we played for some time den it was time for the movie it was great! johnny depp's sexy! hahas..bleahs~~ orlando's nort bad too when he "died" me n jiajia was damn sad la luckily he was revived=) burt i think jiajia was more sad when CHOW YUN FAT died. LOLS!!! seriously i think she did. cux when i said to zaizai n shushu "when he(orlando) died i was so shocked n sad la!" jiajia: "ya lo ya lo!" me: "cux he's shuai rite..lols" jiajia: "ok la chow yun fat nort bad." me: "!!!wth i toking bout orlando bloom lars!!" HAHAHAS!!!! it's okie. cux we ALWAYS knew jiajia liked old men plus she's a stalker. ahahahahahas.. den after the movie we went arcade again lols..wasted alort of money burt it was fun la hahas. we had a great time playing the "counter" game ok watever cux i duno ward's the name of tat game hahas. burt i kena hit duno how many times by miss tan. (-_____-) ah dui. den their "controller"(or watever tat's called) can fly out somemore (-_____-)|| damn funny laugh until i get cramps it was nice lols..let's go play again someday=) second day of holidays
-tuesday 29th May 2007-
went bugis today
and bought a pair of Kappa shoes!
it's black!
hahas and i loved it.
den today supposed to have lessons in the morning
idiot teacher made us wake up early
(i woke up at 5.30am)
and then she pangseh us!
wth..
burt nah
so there's no lesson and we went mac
and i spilled my cappuccino.
it was all over the place.
(T~T)
sadded!!!

third day of holidays
-30th May 2007-
SIGH!
gotta go back to school today for econs n history
damn sian.
as usual woke up at 5.30am
and now im dozing off in front of the comp.
well i jux did doze off.
sian!
burt after the lessons went compass point makan wid my sisters
we couldnt make up our mind on ward to eat
so retarded lor.
so we ended up drawing lots.
and so we ended up in BK.
(-____-)||
and huiting reali noe how to choose seat.
she actuali chose the EXACT seat we used to sat.
lols?
(-____-)||
burt we changed seat after tat la
and after eating the herseys choco sundae pie
i felt happy hahas.
den we talked for a long time
about almost everything we could think of.
it was nice talking to my sisters like tat.
and it was great to laugh our heads off together like tat.
it was the best of times.=)

=))
today went kovan pizza hut wid my sisters
the chinese girls anna janet n zarifah
den ate gelato!
felt so happy hahahas..
den we went to play pool
and gort tis two SUPER CUTE didi
omg so cute lor they
one 11yrs old one 9yrs old
and they looked like twins!
hahas..
they dark dark de abit like malay
burt they are chinese la
and so young already ah beng ah beng lidat.
lols!

so cute k
den dun see they two so young k
they quite pro in pool la!
den me anna n qinling played
den super paiseh k
cux we very lousy
esp me lols..
the two didi are brothers
den the older one coached me
and the younger one helped anna
(the elder brother decide one. hahas)
den very funny
i said
"u two keep staring at me play i will stressed leh"
den the both of them hide under the table!
LOLS!!
so super cute!!!
den the older brother was telling me where to hit
the younger one like gave abit comments
den the older brother like very irritated lidat ask him quiet.
hahas!
still very confident say
"i NEVER fail before."
lols..
pro sia..
den make us these "da jie jie" so paiseh
cux we very lao pok.
hahas..

den go back sch tat time
rain super heavily
we all 8 pple share 2 umbrellas.
(-______-)||
needless to say we were drenched
esp me n jiajia
cux we sheltered the rest
den anna still so evil go flick water on jiajia.
hahas..
bleahs~~

zarifah zarifah!!!!!
can you feel the heat?
you know ward i mean!
HAHAHAHAHAS!!!!

"When You're Gone" -Avril Lavigne

I always needed time on my own
I never thought I'd need you there when I cry
And the days feel like years when I'm alone
And the bed where you lie is made up on your side

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

[Chorus]
When you're gone
The pieces of my heart are missing you
When you're gone
The face I came to know is missing too
When you're gone
The words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it ok
I miss you

I've never felt this way before
Everything that I do reminds me of you
And the clothes you left, they lie on the floor
And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do

When you walk away I count the steps that you take
Do you see how much I need you right now

[Chorus]

We were made for each other
Out here forever
I know we were, yeah
All I ever wanted was for you to know
Everything I'd do, I'd give my heart and soul
I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah

[Chorus]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
-*`` stolen from siokwen's blog ( again. hahas.) ``x-

I know it will never be.

by Elena

I spill my heart out to u,
More and more each day,
But still I know the truth,
I will never have my way.

I care about u more,
And I want it to be less,
The only thing I can do,
Is hope for the best.

I know that its never going to happen,
I know well never be,
But I can hope cant I?
And I cant help but dream.

Its just that these things,
They hurt so much,
But yet I cant cry for u,
Out of everything I do.

Don't u understand,
Yea I know u do,
Cause u feel the same way for her,
As I do for you.

I scream and yell,
But that wont help,
Trust me I tried before,
And I just ended up torn.

But yet I only wish,
That you would hold me in your arm,
Make me feel safe,
Let me think that I would never be harmed.

But I know this will never be,
It would never work,
Since you don't feel the same way for me,
Oh yea and in the past u were a jerk.

Why do I still like you?
I asked my self a million times,
But all I ever came up with,
Was all these stupid rhymes.

I'm trying so hard to let you go,
And let the friendship remain,
But still the truth is yelling out,
I can never just feel one way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

i came across tis song..
quite nice..
and the lyrics are sweet..
here's part of the lyrics tat i like..

though these words i say are true
they still fail to capture you
as mere words can only do
how do i explain that smile
and how it turns my world around
keeping my feet on the ground
my baby
you are the reason i could fly

-*`` stolen from wenwen's blog.. ``*-

I came across many different quotes when I was surfing a net and I took awhile to read all of them...

These are some which I think are quite true and really meaningful...


-it's easy to fall completely for someone.. it's easy to believe all those lies.. it's easy to lose urself to someone u hardly know.. but why isnt it easy to forget someone u love, who found it easy to let u go...

-true love never dies for it is lust that fades away.. love binds for a lifetime but lust just pushes away..

-The magic in love, we follow the rule.."love one another" & if it doesnt workout.. just swap the last 2 words.."love another one"

-think & take time to listen to ur heart, sometimes u need nort ask urself who u love more but ask who really makes u happy & who makes u feel loved

-wake me up when ur heart needs company, take my heart when u feel alone.. turn to me when u need someone to lean on, cux 'til time runs out, i will always stay around..

-i may run out of message to text u, i may run out of good jokes to say, i may run out of battery or even a peso but my heart wont run out of space for someone like u..

-the only way to know tat someone truly loves u is when u turned him down u see him rise from the fall, walk up to u & say " i love u more now than i ever did before"

-It's hard to live alone, its hard to choose someone to love, but the hardest part of falling is to admit that you have fallen in love with someone you didn't mean to love from the start...

-Do you know that the worst day that I miss you is not when you were far away.. it's when you're just right beside me yet I know I can never have you cux i'm simply watching you fall for someone else..

-Sometimes you think you'e gotten over a person but when you see him smile, you suddenly realized you're just pretending you got over him to ease the pain of knowing he'll never be yours.

-You know you love someone when you can only have 1 wish, and that wish wouldn't be for that person to love you..because you wouldn't want that person's love came from a wish but from his heart


Quite true arh ? Haha.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
did some amendments to the typos and the short forms
sorry wenwen for stealing.
hahas..
burt it's reali true and sweet.
^^

it's finally raining today!!
after like so many days of hot sun
do you know something?
i love the rain.
=))

okie actuali i duno ward to blog
jux came here cux im FINALLY abit more free today.
cux i finished ALL my hmwrk (for the time-being)
*grins*
tmr wun be so free ler
cux fri gort lit test.
sigh..

-*`` feeling very complicated n complex today.. ``*-

i actuali felt happy.
plus abit of sadness.
why ar?
(o.O)||

tat mr eurasian i ignore him totally already
he knows my name school n number.
errr!!!
so freaky k.
(-_____-)

today helped gorgor with his maths
wa i noe how to do!!
i can take engineering with him ler lols.
=x
joke la.
my maths n science sucks like hell.

ward's the color of my sky today?
......it's grey.

went school today
short day burt draggy from all the sucky subjects..
gotten back my common test papers..
and i didnt do well..
i mean..as compared to CT1..
got to buck up already..

after school i went town wid wenwen n janet..
cux they wanted to buy wallet
we went to paragon cux janet said there gort roxy
in the end dun have.
(-_____-)||
so we went heeren
and they both bought the same wallet
janet's pink..wenwen's silver..
very nice sia
very tempted to buy burt bo lui(no money)
lols..

after tat janet go meet her bf
and me n wenwen went cine LJS
and eat and chat chat chat
hahas.
so nice=))
den we walked arnd cine
and i bought tis very cute mickey mouse thingy for si hui.
saw it and thought of her immediately.
hope she'll like it.^^

den me n wenwen went home lors.
jiajia n ting ting went cut hair today
in anticipation to see their new hairstyle.
hahahahas..

den reached home
feeling all emo again,
(tat's me.always emoing for no reason)
and depressed,
and there came tis weird guy who msg and called me
AND I DUNO HOW THE HELL HE KNOWS MY NUMBER AND NAME.
pissed off.
im already feeling depressed (again & as usual)
and i hate pple ka-chiaoing (disturbing) me when im emo-ing.
when im emo-ing plsplspls dun come disturb me
especially pple i dun like.
when i emo i onli want MY DARLINGS.
the rest pls stay away cux i'll nort entertain you.
who r my darlings?
zaizai wenwen huiting jiamin anna and zarifah?
onli they tok to me i'll smile.
the rest..sorry cux im reali nort in the mood
as for those i dislike (esp tat mr-weird-eurasian who duno get my no from which bastard who gave my number away)
BEFORE I GET IRRITATED N PISSED OFF
PLS STAY OFF AND LEAVE ME ALONE.

i dun wan anything
i onli want to be alone.

what's meant to be, will eventually become reality.
if both are meant to be, you both will eventually be together someday..
if nort. it's better to let go earlier.
let time be the witness, to see if both are true, if both are meant to be ..
if feelings are true, time can never erase it ..
=)

thanks wenwen..

yippee!
i went for a hair treatment to cure the dry ends
and now it's all nice and smooth again=))
althou it did burnt a hole in my pocket.
(T~T)

anyway
my hair stylist rocks!
strongly recommand Fyn Tang of Chapter 2 @ Marina Square to you all
she's nice and her hair styling skills are great duh.
next time anyone wants a haircut..find her^^
the treatment's reali effective
she helped to straighten my hair back wid a straightener and some hair mask or smth,
meant for rebonded hair.
my hair looks like it's rebonded and healthy now
it saves me from having to rebond again and damaging the hair
yay im so happy!
finally dun have to worry n be upset about my tresses.
=))

Penny Kwan (anth hairstylist) is nort bad too
last time i went to cut my hair short
and he did a great job.
burt i prefer Fyn
cux she's more friendly^^

anyway
my throats hurt man
from the coughing n the sore throat
the coughing's better now
burt the sore throat jux wun go away.
argh.
i hate being sick.

went yuki yaki wid my darlings ytd!
it was college day ytd
and all of us had to go back to sch
zZz..

burt after tat me wenwen ting n jiajia went gaigai
we took MRT to marina square's
den couldnt set our mind on going seoul garden or yuki yaki
in the end we walked to yuki yaki
den to seoul garden
den realise mux wait very long to be seated
den went back yuki yaki again.
(-________-)||
so retarded.
lols!

we had a great time at yuki yaki!
and we took lots of photos n videos!!
here are some peeks of ward we did..



-*`` jiajia n ting munching on sushi~~ ``*-



-*`` FOOD!!!!*yums* ``*-



-*`` tat's huiting..struggling wid the ice-cream. lols.. ``*-



-*`` huiting's coffee ice-cream..wenwen's choco smiley face=) ``*-



-*`` jiajia's grand achievement of vanilla icecream + oreos. huiting says: like mcflurry!! ``*-






-*`` hard work of me wenwen n jiajia. pretty huh? ``*-

of all i loved the frens 4eva "artwork" done by wenwen me n jiajia
miss FP (huiting) never help!!
*bish*
xiao jie. lols.
and why's huiting called miss FP?
onli we know.
MUAHAHAS!
canort say out cux it's too obscene.
kekekex..
had a great time wid my darlings today!!
love ya all=))
*muackiess``*

OH MAN!!
ARGH!!
i actuali said it!!
gosh
man
god
damn
shit
grrrrr
argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(T~T)
i feel like crying liao

argh..
im beginning to regret putting tat post on 22 April.

went ps wid siokwen after sch today
den we ate at long john
and chat for like a super long time
den we went to buy some stuff
and had a great time choosing the papers and ribbons
thanks wenwen for going to buy the stuff wid me^^

adapted from siokwen's blog..

When you think you're in love with that someone,

-you will think of that person anywhere, anytime, at any moment
-you will laugh or smile to yourself when you think of things which are related to him (can be jokes you both talked about)
-you will message him any time when you feel like it.
-you will wait for his message anxiously if he never reply, you will start to wonder if you send it to the wrong person, or think he might be busy so he can't see (find thousands of excuses to make yourself feel better)
-when you see him, you are usually not really yourself. (if you get what I mean.)
-every word he said, anything he mentioned before, you happen to remember, and when you happen to come across things that he mentioned, you will think of them indefinitely.
-if you happen to be with him in the same school, whenever you see his class, you will notice if he's there, when you see him coming towards your direction, you will then talk to friends, look else where instead.
-when you're in the same lecture with him, you will listen to lecture while noticing his actions, his moves.
-you will notice the changes he made (new bag, new shoes)
-you will realise both of you share same similiarities (same taste in a particular thing, same interests, same likings)
-you will get easily hurt by his words (he feel might not be offensive) , but definitely offensive to you.
-any promise he made to you, you will always remember and when he break his promise, you'll feel damn sad about it, and keep asking yourself why must he do this to you.
-if he has friendster, you will go to his page whenever you're free to check his new updates
-you'll stare at his same photos in friendster, even though you just seen it last month.
-if you log in msn, you'll see if he's there.
-if he changes his nick, you wonder who is he refering to in his nick and why he put such a nick (thinking a thousand reasons)
-when you listen to any slow songs, you happen to think about incidents that related to him, be it happy or sad.
-you will feel like talking to him whenever you go msn, or sms him when you're bored outside.
-you will keep his messages (even though it doesn't mean anything in that msg) for years, even if you inbox is flooded, you'll just delete the rest and save his.
-you'll try to keep a photo of him (not in wallet I meant, maybe just wanna have a photo with him)

can't think of other for now..what do you guys have then ? if you know of any, just post it in my tagboard.

Had a talk with eunice. Realised something.
Sometimes, when you see two person who seldom talk to each other in school when they meet, they might be a couple that you least expect.
being a couple in school not doesn't mean to have to eat together, accompany each other everytime in school, it could be two person who seems distant between both of them, that you never think of.

距离并不表示爱情已不存在，
因为重要的不是彼此是否各自一方，而是是否彼此还存有对方。

爱情不一定需要轰轰烈烈才算浪漫，
单纯悬疑默默的爱着对方才算得上浪漫。

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

okie..i have to say
ward siokwen said is VERY true.
i've been thinking.
of my own feelings.
out of the 20 things siokwen said
20 things were exactly the way i felt.
only tat i have some additions to them.

--you'll stare at his same photos in friendster, even though you just seen it last month.
(it shld be even though u jux seen it tis morning)
--you nort only wait anxiously for his reply, you wait anxiously for him to contact u. be it phone call or sms.
--the first thing u think of when u open ur eyes in the morning, is him
--the first thing u do when u wake up, is to check ur phone for his sms-es
--he's the last person u think of before u doze off to dreamland
--u jux put down the phone n u feel like hearing his voice. AGAIN.(-_____-)||

okie i think tat's the most i can think of at the moment
there could be more.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
oh ya!
special day today!
it's my gor's BIRTHDAY~!


Get your own glitter and more at BlingyBlob.com


once again..
sorry i couldnt celebrate wid ya kkies?
im feeling damn guilty over tat..
hope u enjoyed urself wid ur frens!
20 yrs old ler mux grow up liaos.
muahahas~~
dun so childish always bully me!!!!
*bish*
anyway..
may all ur wishes come true n many returns of the day~~!!!
^^

went MOE today
and was damn sian
cux i saw other jc pple wearing sch-u
den i was wearing civilian
den i damn scared is i wear wrong
somemore i duno anyone there.
and my frens were nort arnd=(
den i called zarifah n huiting
and paniked like hell.
lols..
i was damn retarded k.

den reluctantly
i went into the civil service college
thinking if even those SRJCian wore sch-u
den i'll skip it.
luckily i saw a few from the science n they were oso wearing civi
den i was sian again
cux i didnt noe anyone from tat grp of science pple.
so i was waiting arnd
seeing if there were any arts students.
sadly.
i dun see any.
(T~T)

on the verge of dying from the sian-ness
i saw my saviour.
DAVID from guitar!!
at last someone i noe!!
so we went in together(cux he didnt noe anyone too lols)
and saw TESSA from guitar too!
hahas!
i love my cca muacks muacks.
thank god.

so we sat together
and went arnd together lols.
the PSC scholarship is tempting.
burt..
it's difficult to get tat thing huh?
and i dun reali noe if i wan to work in the govt sector in the future.
it's gonna be boring working in the ministeries huh?
(o.O)

after tat thing
me dave n tessa went cityhall to makan
den we went New York New York
it was delicious duh!!!
except tat i couldnt finish my food
the serving was damn HUGE k!
you should have seen the coke float.
it's like 1-litre coke + choco icecream.
lols..ok tat was an exaggeration.
burt reali alort la.
in the end dave had to help me wid the float.
and the smoked-salmon velvet is YUMMY!
i wished i finished up my food.
it's a waste cux tat place's expensive.
and the food is DAMN NICE.
argh!
next time i go i wanna try the chocolate bailey's frost!
i saw tat on the menu and i was super tempted.
burt i din have the stomach n money anymore.
sobs.
they have fruit fondue too!
*drools*
strongly recommand to all of you!!
=D

COMMON TEST'S FINALLY OVER~~~~~~~~~~~!!!

it sucked like hell duh.
i finally gort thru tis hell period.
for the time-being.
sigh.
the next hell period's gotta be mid-yr.
(x.X)

SYF was ytd
and we gort silver
im nort sad..nor happy
lols.
dun reali care ward we get anyway
cux it was an expected silver
anyway ward do u expect
when more than half of the ensom started out as guitar-idiots?
(including me lols.and i still am.)
so..
ya i think we did great!=)
on the way back to sch
the whole ensom was damn high
and me n zarifah were waving to the pple outside
den tis bus came
and gort one uncle looked at our bus
n i waved frantically.
he gort the shock of his life i think
LOLS!!

den we were singing on the bus
singing idiotic n retarded songs
and mr fons..
your singing sucks okie?
(-_____-)||
sing so loud and non-stop somemore
i practically died.
(x.X)
wahahas~~
and stupid fonsus tied my dress to the chair
ah herms!
it's nort funny ok mr-idiot-fons.
dun think u section leader can anyhow.

den zarifah so chio la!
so elegant wid her hair and the gown
both me n zubaida tort she looked like those high class taitai
hahas!
ms SRJC indeed.
LOLS!
and eric looked like mafia
lols!
burt seriously
i think our gown S-U-C-K-S
other jcs ALL wore black
we were damn striking standing there
fons said he heard a hwachong guy said we looked like cooked prawns.
(-_____-)
wth..

den we gort a new couple in the ensom!
hahas..
right mr hua xin?
*winks*

love the ensom.
--``*muuaaacks*
ytd was the first time i was so high wid the ensom
beginning to blend in well
burt we're stepping down soon.
=(
hais.
burt tat's life isnt it?
i'll miss the days going for practice..
and im so looking forward to our "camp(?)"
or maybe chalet or watsoever.

yupps..
so last night reached home at arnd 9pm
and STILL HAD TO STUDY LIT
*pukes*
and dun forget tat there's H1 maths too.
so i think
i flunked both papers today.
esp my lit.
argh..
i was like a walking zombie
er..
a walking-and-studying zombie.
yupps.
until now=)
im alive again!
lols..
yay!!!common test's over!!!
yay yay YAY!!!

anyway
tmr i still have to go MOE for the stupid thing
tat means i have to wake up early.
damn.

gor dunch angry ler la!!
=((

ANNOUNCEMENT:
it's common test week so i wun be blogging for tis week.
=((
no choice.
cant help it.

..............ANYWAY..................
TO ALL MY FRENS OUT THERE:
GOOD LUCK FOR YOUR COMMON TEST!!!
let's cross our fingers n hope we'll survive=))

AND ZARIFAH!!
let's do our best for the upcoming SYF!!
XD
guitar rocks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
yay!^^

we belong to two very different world.
so ya..
sigh.
forget it.

tis's a super nice song..
tat's reali very sweet=))

"Far Away"

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

[CHORUS]
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

On my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

[CHORUS]

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
Believe it
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go
Keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go

tort about it for very long
yupps.
and i've decided to be true to myself.
let nature take its course
if it will happen, den let it be.
no longer avoiding anything.

common test's nxt week.
yuck.
and mister ur birthday very good timing hors?
exactly on my common test week.
(-____-)||
so too bad la.
hahas!

tmr's guitar full dress rehearse.
eee yer!!
u'll see me dead in tat sucky dress man
duno which kns de choose the color n design
*pukes*
im so gonna hide my face tmr
better bring a paper bag.
and
the principal's coming to see
errr!!!
damn i hate tis!
i hate the syf dress.
i dun wan to wear it larss!!!
*pouts*

k la.
i should be studying now actuali.
tis is making me slack.
burt i jux dun feel like looking at tat book.
i've gort a feeling i'll flunk my common test2.
sigh.

went amk hub today!
finally hahas=))
nort bad
quite alort of nice nice shops
bought a SUPER NICE schedule book from artbox
and i bought the movie "step up"!
it's damn nice i mux say
was watching it jux now
strongly recommend to u all^^
im broke..
(T~T)

today gort lesson after guitar
until 8pm
(-_____-)||
teacher super siao.
den damn tired
n it was very dark when i was going home
den im all alone so i was abit scared
thanks gor for calling me
n pei-ing me.
tat was very nice of u.=))

today after sch went study wid timmy
he met me at kovan mrt
den we went compass bk to eat
and studied there.
actuali is more of me studying for my test tmr
and him disturbing me every now n then.
(-______-)||
wasnt reali able to concentrate totally
wid him distracting me everytime
den was very funny
we communicate thru writing little notes
cux both of us listening to song
n he din wan to disturb my studying
and he sweetly drew me a little cartoon
tat said "study hard=)"
make me so happy lols..
den he keep stepping on my foot
and kachiao kachiao
so irritating lols..
den i drew on his hand using PINK highlighter
and PINK pen.
hahas!
den he tried to draw me burt the ink wun come out
LOLS..
and smth hilarious happened when we were on the way home
we were walking to the bus stand
and he was playing wid tat wax he bought
and................
.......................
hahas!
i promised him i wun say out
it's too embarrassing
everyone was turning arnd looking
yupps i wun say out
if nort someone will break ties wid me.
hahahahas..

thanks for the great day timmy
u're the best=))

Adapted from Zarifah's blog..

I played summer for other sections other than section 4 alone at home using Guitar Pro.......and suddenly, I'm overwhelmed by this feelings of sadness that took over me all of a sudden.....I felt like crying cuz it reminds me of all those happy faces that played guitar with me and all those jokes that we crack to make ourselves less tired to repeat the songs that we played over and over again......to know that it all will end soon...less than a month, we wont be gathered that much anymore to play and disturb and mingle with one another. We would be focusing on other important stuff like A-levels....it's like I go guitar everyday with Eunice cuz we cherish the times spent with everyone there......it's like we're united....and both of us already did miss guitar now......though it's too soon...i wonder how the rest feels.....cuz I know I feel sad to wait for the day that we step down from Guitar Ensemble. THough we're admittedly not good, but we work hard and most importantly, we enjoyed the times we spent for our beloved CCA..................I'm anxiously waiting for that day cuz I know I'll be crying like mad.

As for the rest of my classmates.....I'll miss everyone especially my close frens like Huda, Anna, Janet, Eunice.....2A08....

P.S. DAmn!!!! Does it sound like as if I'm going to die tomorrow or migrate to another country forever...hahaz. Just too tired and stressed up I guess.

aw..
im so touched by ward Zarifah said lars..
yupps i will miss u too=))
and yeah..
time reali flies and we're goin to step down soon
i think i will hug my beloved monkey(my guitar) and cry like crazy
Guitar 29..
i will always love u k?
(T~T)
althou im nort ur only owner
burt i reali have to tell u i love u alort.
*muacks*
sorry for nort able to let u produce beautiful music
cux my guitar skills reali sucks
burt i reali treasure u.

ok i noe i sound stupid
toking to a non-living thing lidat.
burt hey
i reali love my guitar.
and after reading zarifah's blog.
im so touched n all emo now k
sigh..
the days im having now are reali the best times of my life so far
althou the stress from studies n stuff
i reali hope time can slow down
and continue feeling so blissful wid my frens arnd..

hist quiz tmr..chinese test on wed
the stress reali sucks.
thank god i have u=))
thanks for always showing support for me
u reali rock!
and ya..
i mean ward i say=))
they come from the bottom of my heart
can u hear it?

guitar was great!
i was practicing wid zarifah
and was so addicted to my guitar
i wasnt willing to go home.
lols..
*siao*

after school went eat wid my sisters
it was raining so heavily
and noble de shushu ferried us wid her umbre
and gort herself abit drenched.
thanks shushu=))
so sweet of her.

and you.
you idiot.
you bendan!!!!!
dun treat me so good ler can?
it's turning my world upside down.
it's shaking my heart
making me lose my mind.
i jux wan to be carefree
cux im afraid of being hurt again.
so..
if u noe u cant give me eternity
leave me alone..can?

had a great date wid my frens=)

after sch i went taka wid huiting n jiajia
den we went to eat pepper lunch
after tat
we went cine to meet timmy
lols
idiot timmy late for like 45min!!!
*bish*
den he rushed like hell i think
and he was perspiring hahas.
den we went to buy tickets for "the haunted school"

and it's starts at 4pm
so we went heeren walk walk first
den we walked into tis shop
and jiajia was looking at the children's tee
and den the shop attendent was like telling us
"tat's for kids"
(-_____-)||
so paiseh k
erms.
as if we r reali interested lols
jaija's jux taking a look
burt damn paiseh k.
so super paiseh.
(o.O)

after tat timmy went to get a hotdog
(cux he haven ate lunch)
den we went cine lers.
wanted to take neos wid my sisters
burt timmy was there
so well..next time lo

den we sat in tis sequence:
aisle.timmy,me,huiting,jiamin.
den beside jiajia no one lers
den me n ting damn scared
and we stick to each other like glue
burt i realise jiajia very ke lian
cux she's all alone
and she's scared too
so i asked ting to go pei her
i alone nvm^^
see i so noble.
LOLS.

burt i reali damn scared k.
den tell u one secret:
timmy was scared too!
lols..
shhh..
den scary part he oso hidehide la
LOLS
den the both of us hide together
hahas..
den he kept trying to scare me
by tapping me out of a sudden
or grabbing my arm suddnly.
(-____-)||
lame pok.
he himself scared he keep scaring me
burt i wasnt scared by him.
wahahas..
laopok.
burt gort one part the ghost come out
den i was damn engrossed
he sdnly grabbed my hand
and i jumped.
(-______-)||
wth.
grrr..
den after the show
timmy pei me to bedok mrt
after he see me to bedok
he go back orchard.
(-____-)|||||
super eng la lame guy
cux poly holidays now.
den we keep suaning each other throughout again
(o.O)
watever!
lols.
idiot gor.

happy day today=))
wish to go out again
hais.
burt i think it's impossible wid tat amount of schoolwork.
waaa
(T~T)
nvm.
i will tell u when im free la.
hahas.

went for the hist today at cjc
damn
saturday oso canort rest
grrr..

after tat hist thing
me n my girls were walking to the bus stop
then jiajia
attracted tis humming bird to her
and den she like swept it off screaming la
lols
den i first time see humming bird in real marhs
so i was saying
"wa!humming bird leh!so cute!"
the moment i say finish
the humming bird came attacking back for us
den i super scared la
the group of us faster run
and i was screaming "NOT CUTE LIAO NOT CUTE LIAO!!"
(-_____-)||

den jiajia and zaizai went home first
cux they going out wid their frens after tat
so me ting n shushu went eat lo
we went mos at toapayoh
den walked arnd
and me n ting bought earrings=)
star star de so pretty de
^^
den i pei tingting wait for bus
and we tok so much la
shushu was saying
"u all nort come shopping de
is come tok de.u all jux walk in rounds n tok."
LOLS..
paiseh.
neglect u lers..=x

waa~~
so happy ne=)
today spend a whole hour singing
wid my darling sisters
shushu brought her lyrics book
den the five of us were singing
(jiamin refused to sing = =)
den so fun ne
zaizai so funny XD
kept singing comically
and tingting kept singing off key
and den kena cold stare by the 4 of us
lols!
i reali loved tat moment.
i wished it will be forever so sweet.
i feel so blessed wid such great frens.

gosh.
i cant imagine the day when we graduate
and get seperated.
i dun wan.
(T~T)
i feel like crying at the thought of it.
i will miss the days so much lars.
*hugs all my dearest frens*
im gonna miss u all so much..

today went LJS wid my sisters during lunch
nice and fun
laughing until i get cramps lols

den last night n today
i gort to noe some reali gross news
tat made me so disgusted.
i wun say ward it was
burt my sisters will noe =)
burt hey
i was so glad im nort so stupid anymore
*phew*
and forrest said i shld be glad
and proud of myself
sure.
im sooooo glad.
and hell yeah im so proud of myself
(^.<)
and yes i believe in retribution=)
(i sound abit scary lols..like ghostly)
burt retribution do exist.
jux like i gort my retribution for hurting someone
i gort my retribution..i gort hurt myself
soon it will be ur turn=)
who cares if u r reading tis.

ok.
back to being myself and stop cursing pple=)
ytd's guitar was a disastor.
burt gort 97 pple signed up!
=D
so happy la.

i reali canort describe how much i love my frens^^
duno why
today was reali happy wid them arnd
ting..zaizai..jiajia..wenwen..anna..zarifah..
=)
muacks!

-x`` i love the freedom..it gives me choices.gives me space.i no longer feel suffocated. ``x-

life's so unfair
i felt so unjustified
burt
thanks to ed for listening
thanks for being there duh.
suddenly im back to the "heck care" mode again
ya tat's good.
=)
and feeling all happy and smiles now^^

and god
finalli i get a break from schoolwork
been slogging like crazy for the past few days
today finally can rest abit
burt think tmr will be crushed again by schwrk
idiot hist made me chiong like siao ytd
and nvr even go thru today.
sucker..
sucker faggot"nat"(invented by anna haha)

k la
wan go snore snore liaos
woke up at 4am tis morning to chiong hist
and in the end nvr go thru
*pissed*

-x`` life's so beautiful.things always come least expected.esp good things.``x-
---and to hell with the unexpected sucky stuff.hahas=)

toking crap today sorry(^^)

enjoying my ONE & ONLY ONE-DAY break today
5day holiday become one day..
wth..
still gort tons & tons of homework somemore..
damn no life..
i jux woke up at like 9am to msg him
den went back to sleep n jux woke up
it rox sia..
so long since i can sleep like a pig..
hais..
our saturday plan is off..
quite disappointed..
in fact very disappointed.
i was so looking forward to it u noe..
burt no choice la..
when he's free im busy
when i'm free he's busy
den he actuali suggested to meet on saturday nite
burt..
how to la??!!
i wish i could oso
sigh.
in the end have to tell him i at night canort
so the plans are off.
(T~T)
reali wish to see him de..
hais..

so now is ward la??!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh man i hate to guess lidat

today's CEC!
woke up early at 5am to rush to sch
den waited damn long for the things to start
sian 1/2
burt have to say it was quite fun
the JC1s quite nice pple..
quite co-operative
den gort a few quite enthu de helped out alort.
thank god there's them
if nort i think i will be super paiseh.
hahas..
abit nervous at first
burt gort used to it after tat
burt the sun super hot!
den gort one class super late
jiamin say i abit face black black
=x
oops.
sorry..
burt after tat i try to be enthu again
hahas..
nice experience!
and after tat on my way home on the bus
i heard tis JC1 girl n boy said tat the CEC was great
and tat SR's quite fun
im quite happy actuali
at least we made them feel welcomed =)
burt gort abit tanned under the hot sun
and my neck is very red and is hurting now
damn..
everytime tan abit i will get burnt.
(-____-)||
hope i dun turn black
(T~T)

tis sat going out marhs?
tell me quick~~~!!!
im so kan cheong about it k
(>.<)

holiday classes finali over!
sian.
no more guitar =(
i like guitar la.
i love my guitar.
muacks.
so fun hahas..
burt nort fun being teased by ms zarifah and mr fonz!
*glares*
shuddup hors u two.

i love my nick: zuan yi.
nick given by mr hua xin.
hahas..
(^.<)

oh ya and i saw nat at heartland mall today
when i was eating at yoshi
wid my group of girlfrens
he's nort very good looking in real person
in fact i think he looks abit gay.
lols..
sorry if i offended anyone.
i used to think he's good looking when i see him on tv
burt seems like me n huiting were deceived!
hahas!
and i heard tat he's from st gabs.
yuck.
dun have good impression of tat sch.
=x

FINALLY i get some time to blog.
it's like war everyday sia.
i reach home at 8pm on mon wed n fris
and 6+ on tues
den need to chiong hmwrk until like siao.
J2 life's reali hectic and making me crazy
and me n my frens all gort the
"sleepy syndrome"
except for miss jiajia who can sleep at 8.30pm
and still say she's tired n sleepy!!!
dorts.
(-____-)||

it's been a better week,
nort as busy as last week
burt it's been a quiet week too.
haven heard much from him
since he went to work.
he told me work's crazy too
been busy like siao.
well..?
i duno lars.
*shrugs*
watever.

it's term break next week
burt reali,
it's worse den normal school day.
wth lors!
mon tues wed i have to stay in sch
from morning till 6pm
jux one or two half an hour break in btwn.
i think im reali going crazy.
den thurs gort CEC
duh!
wanted to go out wid my frens oso no time
burt we planning smth for saturday
hope it's smth good n fun.
i need a break!

qinqin's going malacca today
have a good trip zaizai!
gonna miss ya^^

sigh.
ward's wrong wid u?
ward's wrong wid me?
ward's wrong wid us?
tell me u idiot.

im missing u
have i fallen for u again?
i duno.
burt i have a very uneasy feeling
is it a phobia from the past relationships?

althou u ask me to guess how u feel
burt i reali duno leh.
so when u ask me to guess
i can onli act blur.
sigh.
jux tell me if u wan to..
dun leave me guessing..

wasnt feeling very well today
n i have tat sucky econs retest after sch
i ended at 12.30 n have to wait till 4.30 for it
grrr..

i finished at 5.30
den after tat retest
i bth and threw up
sian 1/2
somemore i din sleep well last night
i was quarrelling wid my dad
so i had panda eyes n eyebags
the bad thing is
im meeting tat pig sia.
in the end have to let him see me in such a bad condition!
he waited for me outside the sch gate
den siokwen was like telling him
"she's nort feeling well take care of her k?"
den he nodnod lors.
and throughout the journey
he kept asking me
"r u going to vomit" and stuff lidat
(-____-)||

den we went to take bus
quite alot of pple
burt we managed to grab 2 empty seats
den he sat inside
i can see he sit until very cramp la
cux he's legs too long
lols..
so after a while i said
"can i sit inside?"
cux i dun like sitting outside oso
so he said
"ok..burt u might nort wan to"
i gave him the (o.O) look
den he say
"i stand up den u noe lers"
burt when he stood up i sat in
i din see anything
(-____-)||
den he told me
"jux now when we board the bus the inner seat was wet
so i let u sit outside"
"burt now nort wet ler,cux i sat on it"
lols.
den i say
"huh..den y u nvr say earlier.."
den he said
"cux im noble."
*pengs*
(-_____-)||

den we talked bout our lifes for the past yr,
cux very long nvr see each other ler marhs.
den sit too close i dun dare look at him..
burt throughout the whole journey he kept staring at me
even when im nort toking.
so i try to tok as much as possible
if nort very paiseh
burt there was once i was silent for a while
cux i very tired n sleepy
he was like looking at me for a long long time
den i "chua tio" la
abit panicky and duno ward to do
so i turned arnd n say
"y u looking at me lidat??!"
den he say
"why cannort?"
(x.X)
den i say
"dun look ler la!very paiseh leh!"
den i turn away
burt he was still looking lars!
den he "am chio" somemore.
wth..
den i change topic and tok bout my frens
den nort so awkward.
den after tat gort anth time silent n he look at me again
burt i pretend nvr notice den look out of the window.
lols..

den at the interchange
we were waiting for the bus
den he suddenly look at me again and said
"ur eyes very big leh"
out of nowhere.
(-_______-)!!
den i say
"huh!"
den i faster use my hands to cover my face
i duno y i did tat burt i was super paiseh so i wanted to hide
den he laughed
and said
"it's a good thing ward y hide ur face"
den i say "huh.." as i slowly take down my hands
den he said
"u r blushing.."
(o.O)!!!!
den i faster cover my face again
den he laughed
zZz..(-_____-)||
idiot k him.

den i reached home lers
so we sms lors.
den he still dare to tell me
"i realise i keep looking at u today"
dorts.
so i told him it was very paiseh
den he say
"maybe too long nvr see u lers now mux see "ge gou"(see until enough)"
*pengs*

it was a great time =)

i guess things had changed.
no longer like last time when we first knew each other.
abit disappointing.
and so sian.
i hate it when pple change
like..
they have changed from my fren
to a stranger.
sigh
or maybe in the first place
i didnt noe u well enough?

poor tingting fell sick today
and went home early
*sayang*
hope u r ok.
get well soon k?

had a great time at guitar today
=)

ytd chiong hmwrk until now super tired
burt wan spend sometime blogging bout ward happened ytd
it's anth day wid the sunshine today!
althou there's lots of work to be done.
today feeling very very happy
(althou im tired)
very high esp when there's guitar!
hahas i think im abit crazy over guitar now.
^^

feeling abit confused now.
maybe cux im abit mixed up.
btwn the reality n the past.