ytd was the release of A'level results.
first of all,
congrats to my little junior kuan wu
who scored 3As for his H2!!
woohoo~u are one smart son!
so proud of you=)

i rmbr one year ago
we were experiencing this same veryvery intense feeling.
worries, anticipation, fear.
one year just flew by like that,
unknowingly, our year 1 uni life is also ending soon.
i really missed the jc times.
i miss my dear frens and the life we had tgr.

i saw this on minmin's blog.
i've asked for her permission alrdy,
and i've decided to share it with everyone.

~
adapted from minmin's bloggie:
Anyways like I said, I was feeling a teeny weeny bit of sadness when I saw how happy my friends were when they know that they are able to enrol into local unis.
Maybe what I felt was something known as "envy".
Then I started to ponder...

What if I have re-retaken A`s as well?
Could I have achieved good results like what my friends have gotten?
Could I be able to enter the prestigious local unis as well?
And by doing so, could I have been able to fulfill the dreams of my parents and I?

I know it`s useless to think about this now because well, life has moved on for me.
To quote Mindy`s catchphrase, maybe "God has other plans for me."

So while making our way to TM Mac with Amina, I thought over what happened to me that time last year.
I remember the nerves clearly.
I remember that I was very excited before I got my results.
I was smiling and laughing and playing with my girls though we were nervous.
When I saw my result slip, I stoned for a moment and laughed.
Laughed out loud.
Just then, HQ caught me and dragged me to a corner.
That was when she gave me a beary hug and I collapsed in her arms.
Drama, I know.
Then Amina brought me out and we walked from the school to Tampines Interchange.
We never talked for once during the walk.
It was an antagonising walk, as far as I can remember.
I reached home, without uttering a word to anyone, threw my dreaded result slip on the floor and locked myself in the room.
Cried myself to sleep.
My parents were clueless as to what to do about me.

There were some things which I came to know about during the dark period of my life-
Murphy`s Law: Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.
And this very own motivational phrase from dear Mel mel: Form is temporary; Class is permanent.
I remember how Talia used to counsel me as well, telling me that it was not the end of the world even if I flunked my A`s.
I thank all my friends who brought me out of the emotional distress.

One year on and I`m living life well.
Though the thought of being unable to further my studies in a local uni seems like a regret for me, I will, however, say, who doesn`t have regrets in life?
RIGHT?

PS: Sometimes being too optimistic in life helps.
~

when i saw ward minmin wrote on her blog i felt like crying.
these are the things we have to go through to grow up
the harshness of reality and life
the inevitably of getting hurt.

min's words reminded me of my very best fren.
she'll have to start facing reality very soon.
and im very worried for her.
be strong. pls be strong no matter ward the outcome is.
stop avoiding. pls. dun hide in ur own world anymore.
it hurts me to see you like this.
i missed the days. i miss you. i miss you so much.
and i wan to see u happy and cheerful. from the bottom of ur heart.
not just false fronts.

everyone will meet their ups and downs.
it's part and parcel of life.
u're not alone,
u have us.

like me now..
i have to say. i hate my uni life.
im not as strong. you know eueu had nvr been a strong person.
im always reliant on my frens arnd me for support.
but im learning to love my life. or at least trying to accept it.
bcux i know
no matter how much i hate my life,
there's nothing i can do to escape from the things i hate.
i will have to face it anyway.
i can only make things btr by looking at it from anth perspective
or working on different aspects to make myself happier.

im still a unhappy eueu.
i still hate uni. still hate studying.
i still cant enjoy my life. im still deprived of my freedom.
i still cldnt get on good terms with my family, and its getting worse in fact.
and i still miss jc life and my jc frens very much.

i couldnt extract myself out of all these troubles.

but im trying. bcux life has to move on.
i try to do my work. bit by bit.
and i make myself feel btr by thinking bout my bunny.
i talk more to pple. since i cant go out to meet them. msn. sms. phonecalls.
cux i love the pple arnd me.
i try to communicate patiently with my mummy. althou im not giving much a damn to my dad.
and i try not to think of jc all the time. occasionally i do emo over it thou.

its tough. im tired of trying all the time.
but giving up will only mean that i will feel even worse.
so dun give up too, okay?
we'll all be working on our lives. making it better.
its a forever thing.
bcux we want happiness dun we.

and one last thing.
you are my best fren. and it will stay that way.

Student jumps to his death after stabbing lecturer at Nanyang Technological University

A final-year male student jumped to his death after stabbing and wounding a lecturer at Nanyang Technological University today.

University officials confirmed that the young man was dead and that the professor, identified as Professor Chan Kap Luk, was in a stable condition in hospital.

Friends of the dead man identified him as David Hartanto, a 22-year-old Indonesian-Chinese student, and the university said his family had been contacted.

Mr Hartanto and Prof Chan, who is in his 40s, were both from NTU's Electrical and Electronics Engineering faculty, where the attack took place.

Reports say the Mr Hartanto had been who had slit his wrists before leaping off the multi-storey engineering building.

His body was found at the foot of the building.

Police at the scene were trying to establish a motive for the attack, which sent shockwaves across the campus and horrified friends and family of both men in Singapore and Jakarta.

"The university is deeply shocked and saddened by what has happened," NTU President, Dr Su Guaning, said in a statement.

"The matter will be investigated thoroughly. The university community will rally together at this difficult time and do our utmost to help the student’s family, the professor and his family, and those traumatised by the incident.”

Past and present NTU students were shaken by the incident.

They said the dead man had been a bright and friendly student who came to Singapore to study after graduating from SMUK 1, a top high school in Jakarta, where he had excelled at mathematics.

Mr Ivan Jeremiah, 23, an ex-NTU student who was also the assailant's schoolmate at SMUK 1, told MSN he was "shocked" by the tragedy.

"He was quite high-profile in school and used to appear in school journals and magazines," said Mr Jeremiah. "I never expected that something like this would happen to him."

Dr Su said the university’s counselling professionals have been mobilized to help.

NTU was helping the police with investigations, he said.

SEE! we really shldnt study too much leh!

Singapore's education system is TOOO stressful

especially uni (T~T)

your life isnt as messy as u thought of it to be.
think about it. u are very fortunate as compared to many others.
so stop bringing yourself down, stop grieving,
start loving your life. start loving yourself.

if you really hate your life that much.
then work to make it better.
emoing doesnt help. it will only make it worse.
in life,
one plays many differing roles.
sometimes one will get tired. one will get the roles mixed up.
and the expectations of each roles will get you crazy
but no matter ward
bear in mind..
love yourself. bcux others love you too.


so do the best you can. but most imptly. be happy.

大嘴巴 - 永远在身边

Baby boy永远永远手牵手
一步两步一起走
永远永远要记得
我们要一起生活

不管晴天的时候
不管下雨的时候
不放开手到永久
我们要一起生活

眼泪 她为你流过 也为自己掉过
对于你们的爱 她总是抱着坚强的笑容
错过那些时间 谢谢她的守候
是时候 紧紧牵她的手 带她到你的城堡里

最近还好吗 想念的心开不了口
枯想着妳有没有好好过 担心着妳每天生活
你好吗 最近如何 照顾身体工作加油
我一个人也会勇敢好好过 不让你担心多一秒
想念着 每天每秒我们故事 每天每秒说好的事
两个人一起散步 是最浪漫的事
你是我的天使 给我力量能够坚持

那些关心问候 翅膀一样的双手 是我最幸福的所有
心里面有你建的角落 脆弱时我能够躲一躲
妳爱我 像翅膀一样温柔的手 我要抱着妳不要再错过
你的爱 是最蓝那片天空 cuz baby girl I’m coming back home

Baby boy永远永远手牵手
一步两步一起走
永远永远要记得
我们要一起生活

不管晴天的时候
不管下雨的时候
不放开手到永久
我们要一起生活

幸福 少了妳在身边不会完整
人潮中朝你走来那张可爱微笑的脸孔
这份爱 不是悸动 守护一辈子的感动
这段路踏着幸福的每一步一起牵着手

心疼妳会睡不好 总是缩在床的一角
我要回来给妳依靠 哄妳看妳笑着睡着
照片里 你的微笑 我们甜蜜的打闹
好希望微风把思念 代替我亲吻你嘴角
想念着 每天每秒我们故事 每天每秒说好的事
约定好去看的风景 爱谱成了诗
你就是我的天使 给我力量能够坚持

阳光灿烂午后 我又在街上走 你的影子不再寂寞
想到你的身边到不了 像个路人般看热闹
经过那个属于我们的转角 走过两个人曾经逛的街
那些店 还有熟悉的画面 oh baby girl I’m coming back home

Baby boy永远永远手牵手
一步两步一起走
永远永远要记得
我们要一起生活

不管晴天的时候
不管下雨的时候
不放开手到永久
我们要一起生活

没有办法想像 那画面
一个孤独的背影走在 小公园
一颗心 需要暖 一双手 需要牵
故事要有美好结局 需要两双手来写
永远 不是只出现在童话里的梦
在身边 眼泪加了蜜糖甜
这句点 要完美画在无名指上
承诺的开始
恋人们 要一起珍藏


baby boy i miss you.

went to bunny's house today~
okay we were supposed to study tgr
(poor bunny's exams are coming)
but we ended up slacking n playing
arghh!!
but we did have a fun time tgr so bunny thanks for sacrificing ur study time for us=)

i went to bugis to buy J.CO donuts before going over to bishan
and saw baby donuts (damn cute!) so i bought those instead of the normal ones^^



(i didnt take photos so these are grabbed from the net)

and this is so sweet!


i duno but i definitely like J.CO and krispykreme out of all the donuts.. donut factory is not bad too
it's a pity krispykreme is no longer in hongkong and never in singapore at all=(

and bunny gave me a very pleasant surprise..
he bought a pair of pretty slippers for me
it was black! love them..thank you bunny=)
i felt that it was certainly quality time tgr and im glad we could meetup before u have to start mugging for exams.

study hard bunny.
hope to see ya soon after the 7th=)

went to meet minmin today to pass her her PS. I Love You novel.
like finally cux i've gotten it back from hongkong like months ago


we went to sakae teppenyaki for lunch
our first time there n it was great
she surprised me by asking her fren - terence along
lol actuali bunny wanted to come too de but he had to work so ya><

u actuali had the chef cooking in front of u it was damn cool
i took this photo to show tat they are cooking for us okay. no special intentions like ward minmin said=.=
BUT i did her a favour as she tot tat he was cute HAHAHA! (min's so gonna kill me)

yummy~






lots of MUSHROOMS JIAJIA! drool!


very milky icecream~


no photo of ter cux they were saying its ugly n deleted all the photos!
(T~T)
maybe it's ter's problem HAHAHA oops=x

i have to admit ter is not bad a photographer. love the photo angles haha

credits to min's ixus baby and me n ter's camming skills=p

~taken from minmin's blog~
Anyways, one funny thing happened.
Aiya, don`t feel surprised cos things can`t be normal with me around. ;)
So, the other chef was preparing my chicken and when he asked who it was for, my reflex response was... guess what.
I raised my hand and exclaimed, " 有！"
The chef stared at me for a few seconds and said, "Oh. You don`t need to raise your hand you know."
=_______+
Ya and the 2 sadistic freaks who sat beside me broke into thunderous laughter.
~~

and we were telling the chef "dun help her refill her cup unless she raises her hand okay"
LOLS!
what a cute fren i have XD

and then after the meal we went to post office to pei min mail her stuff
and walked to beach road to pei ter book the place for dinner
then ter went off to the lib to study (!!!hardworking mugger haha)
and me n min went shopping~

so till we meet again! =)

okay i have several backlagged posts.

wednesday 18feb2009
after school i went to watch bridewars with bunny.
throughout the whole movie i couldnt take my eyes off anne hathaway
i love her puppy brown eyes. wished i had something like that too.

and then we went to marche..
haha bunny's first time there.. hope it was interesting.
afterwhich..it was arcade and the petshop..then we went to bishan
we sat awhile at the swings and had a good chat under the nightsky..
it was very breezy and pleasant.
then we went to bunny's house lol
bunny's family very cute haha
had a very cosy time. thanks=)

friday 20feb2009
today after school i went out with jiajia and rifah
actuali skipped my socialwork lect (again hais) bcux yichen didnt go
then we went to cityhall area walkwalk
and i had macaroons!
woots.
then the 3 of us sat at spinelli cafe and chat and jiajia starting toking bout ghost stories
which made me n rifah scared like hell
jia was scared too>< then when i was on my way home damn scared lol..but was on the phone with bunny so felt better =)

Qin&Tofu
qinqin flew off to perth today lo
am toking on msn with tofu and she just went off to fetch qin's arrival at the airport
isnt it just so sweet tat the couple can spend a month tgr in a foreign land
envious sweet sweet(>.<)

today i was supposed to go see qin off at the airport
qinqin was supposed to be at the airport at 3.45pm to check in
so i was thinking tat i'll go over anytime before her flight at 5.45pm
who knows qin had to go in first at arnd 4pm and i didnt know
i was busying and my phone wasnt with me cux i left my stuff at en's place arghh.
my poor darling qinqin called me 6times and 2 smses to tell me she's going in earlier.
and at 4plus5 i went out to check my phone
(and we were alrdy preparing to leave for the airport)
then i realised qin's alrdy gone=(
i was so sad.
qinqin! i french braid my hair today leh.
wanted to show u de=(
but luckily we managed to tok on the phone for a few moments before she had to board the plane
qinqin i still love u okay. *hughug*
will make up the hug n kiss for u when u come back.

and then today i visited tofu's blog n im so touched
see how much she loves us (the card we gave her)

we love u too k tofu!
u dun sadsad in perth
cux we are here okays. u have lots of frens who love u!
and i love her new house in perth!

love the roses and cosiness.
so be happy okay meowmeow! *hugs*

Shushu
this is specially for shushu.

happy 20th birthday my dear girl!
i know tis birthday is a very devastating one
but hey..it's the beginning of a new decade of ur life
we all hope you will be happy okay?
pls dun get too upset.
my dear fren. i wished i could be there for you.
to make u smile
and feel tat there are still pple who loves u here.

pls dun get too upset and take care of ur health.
my regards to your grandma too.

bunny..i had a great day with you today and im so glad to have you.
thanks for all the things you bring to my life.
i hope this could stay on forever.

~loves for all the people so dear to my life.
today is so eventful..so many things happened
and im loving all of you even more.~

hi everyone~
okay sorry it's been quite some time since i blogged but i reali dun have much to write
actuali i already gotten over the stupid dumb inferiority complex thing
so now eueu is a happy me~
althou i still get my emo-ness every now and then lols.

had been busy with school, msning and going out sometimes.
typical eunice's life.
haha last thursday went to have dinner with my darling girls
tofu flew back to perth on monday and tomorrow qinqin will be flying off to join her
i certainly hope you guys have a great time there.
qinqin u take care of urself and just go there have fun dun think bout anything else okays!
we'll all be missing you 2 here=)

the dinner was great!
for the first time of my life i tried escargots. (snails!!!!)
haha it was fine.
the garlic taste was so strong u actuali onli tasted garlic.
lols..
jiajia was the last to try and she was actuali the most undaring one.
jiajia u lost to tingting le la! lols
after the dinner we went for dessrts~
it was a dessert house selling hongkong desserts
hongkong's better=p
lols..okay la it was fine..we'll just have to make do with it i guess.
since we are in singapore><

next week would be my recess week already
not really looking forward to this one-week holiday actuali
bcux it will mean that many assignment deadlines are coming up
HELP~~~(T.T)
and i still have to take at least 2 days off to go do my fieldtrip and agency visit for my reports.
grwrrrrrrrrrrr

i think i need to find a way to tide over this inferiority complex thing...
it's killing me!
i couldnt sleep
insomnia.
fell asleep at 2am plus last nite
its horrible.
throbbing headache.

6th feb 2009
went out with jiajia after school for dinner at cityhall~
it was really horrible bcux we were totally drenched from the rain.
we were saying it must be our retribution bcux jiajia ponned her hall activity and i ponned my socialwork lecture
retribution for skipping classes and being a bad kid=(
but we did had a good meal at a japanese restuarant hahaha
and me and jiajia were snatching with each other over the MUSHROOMS
evil jiajia ate alot and still accused me for eating alot=(
SI JIAJIA EVIL JIAJIA
but jiajia IS STILL THE BEST bcux
THANK YOU JIAJIA FOR SKIPPING UR HALL ACTIVITY AND PEI-ING ME FOR DINNER INSTEAD OF JOINING UR FRENS.
appreciated=)

7th feb 2009
today i went to BBQ with my ex-colleagues at my ex-boss's condo clubhouse
it was excellent althou it was drizzling.
i had a good time catching up with my ex-co and biting nana's hand
MUAHAHAHAHA!
and then the funniest part was
i was trying to remove the foil paper for the BBQ sweet potato with my fork
then my fork dug into the potato and my butterfingers made my fork FLICKED
and then siqi, who was sitting in front of me
was covered with bits and pieces of sweet potato.
LOL im SORRRY~~~
and she didnt realise until i looked at her in HORROR
and then she looked down at herself and was like (-_____-)||
LOLS!!! IM SORRRRRYYYY!!!!!
and we all missed haoxiang too!
its a pity u werent here=(

i'll upload the photos when i get them=)

freeeaaaakkkk
ward can i do to make myself feel better?

飞轮海 = flying gear sea???
(it's fahrenheit my dear fren.)

LOLS!

silly you really had me laughing hahaha

start of school again today
and i feel damn crushed.

nvm.

eunice is going to be positive positive POSITIVE about school.
im not going to let all these pressure pull me down like it did last semester.

this post is specially for my very nice hongkong fren that had been with me all this time.

yesterday i was spending my time online with all my frens
and then chatting chatting
ahshe suddenly say
"doing something very important wait a min"
i said
"okie."
and i thought he was busy so i never said anything n waited
then i saw my emails and facebook notices keep popping.




LOLS!!

and i was feeling damn weird ward he's doing.
it turned out that he was trying to leave me a special CNY greeting on facebook.
HAHAHAS!
i really laughed until i fell onto the floor when i keep seeing the number of notices on facebook increased, and all is him leaving a comment on my wall.
thanks alot boy, u sure cheered me up these days when im feeling down.

╭┘└┘└╮∴°☆°
└┐．．┌┘───╮∴°
╭┴──┤Happy ├╮
│ｏ　ｏ│牛YEAR │●°
╰┬──╯　 　 │ ∴°﹒
☆ ˍ|ˍ/ˍˍˍˍˍ/∴☆

yay!
hope the new lunar year can be happy happy no worries no sadness!
(haha copied this from my fren n flooding everyone everywhere with it LOL=p)

i saw this on minmin's blog

"Close friends are truly life's treasures. Sometimes they know us better than we know ourselves. With gentle honesty, they are there to guide and support us, to share our laughter and our tears. Their presence reminds us that we are never really alone."
- Vincent van Gogh -

so true right.
i tell u lor oh my freaking goodness u cant imagine how much my frens care for me.

shushu read my blog and asked me ward happened
i didnt wanna tok bout it so i just said "dun wanna tok bout it.just anth jerk again."
then shushu totally guessed
"he must have asked u out..or sms to chat..or on msn .. or helped u do something..so u think he's nice..plus his looks not bad"

shushu u can be fortune teller. TOTAL SPOT ON.

and then ytd qinqin and simon were scolding this jerk all along (while toking to me la not scold him directly)
and qinqin laughed like mad at this loser.
and simon keep giving me drawings to make me happy.
jiajia tis morning i talked to her n im really glad cux i felt tat jiajia loves me so much too.
xavier oso he's been there throughout.
yichen oso very concerned about my sorethroat and my mood.

then yichen teach me some skill to judge pple.
much thanks tis is a very vital lesson to me.
and shushu say
"these very typical ones.. everytime the same trick.. they not sian i oso sian liao"
lol now i know ward typical tricks.
ahaha next time see i know the tricks will caution liao.

people. now u see how much my frens care for me.
everytime i do stupid things but they never gave up on me.
im so touched.
i love you all too!

comecome all my good frens im giving each and everyone of u a big kiss.
XD

and i just read minmin's blog.
and i just chatted with xavier.

it always makes me happy to see my name on min's blog
and xavier's words are so mature as always.
they made me feel lighter, not so upset anymore.

xavier made me looked clearer. at least, a little more clearer.
he told me i should be more street smart, and protect myself
its okay to be sad over the loss of a fren
but shld recognise that long-term frens are those who are most concerned bout me
and most precious.
i should start learning not to think about how others feel but more of how i feel.
bcux we cant predict how others feel but we can control how we feel to make ourselves happier.
i'll try, okie.
bcux im too used to putting other's mood before my own.

and then minmin..
i duno if our decision was right
but in anyway.
we r definitely here for each other.

all my frens..

no words could spell my gratitude to the kind of care concern and love of friendship u all give me.
and how much i treasure you all.
thank you.

eunice will learn to grow up. she will struggle and feel lost but pls pardon her.
eunice, grow up.

some things happened ytd and i duno how jiajia n yichen will look at me but

this incident certainly made me doubt myself for ward kind of person i really am.
jiajia was right,
why i knew from the start that there is danger/will be hurt but still insist on going forward to make myself hurt
go search for trouble and danger.

it is true and i know very well of that.
yet im still like that and i hate myself for doing these.
jiajia's words were a direct smack on my face.
yet i still felt very very sad that i made someone angry.
and i still keep thinking that he's a nice person.
ward the hell am i thinking?
ward the hell am i doing?
i've so many frens who love me ward ! the ! hell ! am ! i ! thinking !

but one thing for sure.
i see truely that jiajia and yichen are good friends that will protect me as long as they can.
im really happy to have such frens.

jia n yichen alrdy told me its dangerous.
and yet up to this point i still think he's a good person.
and im very sad that i lost a fren.
im freaking stupid gullible and naive.

i really wished that i was as tough as jiajia shushu tingting and not give in to my emotions so easily.
i wished i had a heart made of stone so at least i wldnt get hurt anymore.

dear friends,
thanks for always being there.
im sorry for always doing stupid things and making you guys worry for me.

i duno if you were referring to me but..
if you were here's my reply:



it's not really clear so click on it to read okie.

it's hard to wait around for something that you know might never happen. but it's even harder to give up especially when it's everything you ever wanted.