it is kboxing day!!

we were also celebrating shushu's birthday in advance
cux i tort we're all working and it would be better if we celebrate it on a weekend where everyone's relaxed and energetic
anyway
i met qinqin up for lunch at 12.30pm
and we ended up walking from orchard mrt to far east
cux she said she wanted to go there.
i tort she said she wanted to go there n EAT so i jux said ok.
in the end we go there we DUNO WARD TO EAT
then i asked her "u say wan come here de so ward u wan eat?"
and she replied "i only wanted to come here to walkwalk cux vry long nvr come ler."
(-________-)
and i was like thinking "tian ar im starving"
so we ended up buying Shi Lin chicken chop and fruits
thinking we jux eat some finger food n later go wisma for lunch.
then we gort SO full by the "finger food" and the chicken chop made the both of us breathe out fire.
we even shared one chicken chop burt couldnt finish it bcux i think the person was trying to murder us by adding so much chilli powder.
he gave us an extra big serving thou. ( maybe he's oso trying to stuff us )
so we took a walk arnd, and ended up to mogu mogu's to try out the cute bento.

here're the photos we took:

chicky chick bento!!!! how cute!:



a close up of the chick:



we gave it a "hat":



qin trying to "sexual harass" the chick LOLS:



and me trying to eat it up haha:


oh ya!
we also saw this weird guy tat keeps drinking water.
it's like he drank TWO LARGE drink from KFC
and ONE CAN of soya milk.
(-_______-)
me n qin were thinking there's a high possibility he'll have his fourth drink too.
well so after that we went to meet shushu,
and went to kbox @cineleisure.
then at arnd 5pm tingting n jiajia popped out with the cake
they bought oreo cheesecake n it was excellent!
*drools*
shushu was surprised!
and we're so glad to see her happy =)
happy birthday again shushu! hope you liked the day! =))

here are the photos @kbox:


shushu and qinqin AND our messy table:


shushu n qinqin with mic:



unglam me n qin take 1:



unglam me n qin take 2:



unglam me n qin were singing "ai cuo" by leehom:



and then after the session ting n jia left while we continued singing for an hour
then meeting up again after tat for dinner @takashimaya
and here are some zilian-ing photos of us in taka's toilet:



(i will add more photos in after receiving them from jiajia n shushu's camera)

that's all for now!=))

happy valentine's everyone!

as usual.
this year's valentine's im single.
and this year,
there's NO SCHOOL
NO FRENS to hang arnd with.

burt hey,
im taking it well.

eddie's right.
valentine's day is overrated.
one can be happily single on valentine's too.
at least im happily chatting on msn now. haha.
to 8 singles???
im definately breaking my msn chatting record.

saw the reply. the doll IS a volks williams.
the point is,
the collectors like to change their eyes and face paint,
so this volks williams looks different from the original one on the volks web.
it's a main structure of the doll, then pple customize it.
ah.. now we know.
learnt so much from this.
and im starting to be interested i think.
burt one thing for sure,
i wanna find that doll and buy it.

if anyone sees it plsplsplspls tell me plssssssssss?
here's the pic of the volks williams im searching desperately for:



it's the doll in white suit, in the individual photo on the left,
and wearing specs in the groupie.

i've found the owner.
he created this doll.
the problem is, i dun think he wanna sell it?
burt i've just ask him if he would sell, or know anyone else who has the exact same doll.
keep ur fingers crossed and pray hard for me pls.
i really really wan tat doll so much.

i guess i should not watch "e zuo ju zhi wen" ( a taiwanese idol serial ).

bcux everytime after i watch it,
i get too into it and feel sad.
bcux i know i'll never be as lucky as the girl in the show,
to be able to spend so much time with the guy i like.
this is getting bad cux it makes me emo.

eventually the girl will get married to that guy she liked for 5years.
all along,
it was an one-sided love for the girl,
burt after knowing each other for so long,
the guy felt touched by her actions bit by bit,
and fell for her too.

althou i know it's a happy ending already,
i wanna watch on.
bcux it's nort the ending that makes me feel touched,
it's the process of how the girl strived on and was heart broken again n again.
burt still, she clinged onto that faith,
the faith that she loved the guy,
and the hope that he will be touched one day.

i know it's stupid.
taiwanese idol serials are nothing burt fairytales of the modern world.
and that a girl should never get so crazy for a guy,
to put down her pride and soul,
for a guy who most probably will never love her back.
burt.. who says this is impossible in the real world?
it can be that a girl is waiting stupidly for this guy she like for a long time too.
the only part that will never come true is only the ending.
which good-looking, IQ200 genius guy will be so honest n true?
and choose a blur and dumb girl over the other smart beauties?
the ending was bullshit.
burt it still made my tears flow.
bcux..
isnt that ward i'll never be able to achieve?

i duno ward i wanna achieve too.
why am i waiting?
ward am i hoping for?
i dun have any answer.

a simple "hi" could make my day.
a simple call could make my week.

the guy felt touched eventually because he could SEE and KNOW all the things the girl did for him.
burt he couldnt see ward i've done and went thru,
so he'll never know.
how can he be touched this way?!

so it's hopeless for me.
i wished i could be like the girl.
i wanna be there,
burt he's drifting further n further instead.
im willing to do anything,
give up everything,
wait forever,
to exchange that one day of him turning arnd and notice me.
i could trade a lifetime for a day.
no?
how about a lifetime for an hour then?
god can u hear me???!

no. no replies from god, no chance no hope.
no im nort a christian,
burt i've been praying to him since i was 12 to grant this little wish of mine.
christians, no offence pls.

someone laughed and jokingly told me that im under a spell.
i wished, at least there'll be an antidote.
where's MY antidote??!

he was packing earlier,
now, he just left home, back to camp.
i rushed thru my stuff to come back online before he leaves,
so that i could pathetically hold onto the last minute to see the green little figure beside his name STILL green.
now it's back to red again.
and then i'll have to wait another five days before it turns green again.
and then the same routine again.
i pathetically typed a msg to him
gort his pathetic answer telling me he's "packing n have to go already"
and then pathetically told him to take care cux i didnt know ward else to say.
and pathetically came here to emo again.
and then now pathetically staring at the window he replied me,
and that pathetic sentence:
"[ahfan]™ HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!! WISHING ALL ANG POW MANY MANY!!!! appears to be offline. Messages you send will be delivered when they sign in. E-mail this contact instead"
now how PATHETIC can i get???!!!

why make myself so miserable when i can be happier,
why choose misery over happiness?
burt that's my choice.
and i will never regret it.
( this is to the other him is reading this. in case u're wondering. )

well. enough of emo-ing.
time to get back to my senses.
work tomorrow,
and cant wait for sunday to come.
cant wait to meet my mates,
cant wait for kboxing.

pray for me that tmr's work isnt too stressful pls.

still feeling abit grey today
burt the work and hanging arnd with my colleagues made me forget about emo for awhile.
smart nana...
saw thru me and sms-ed me if im ok.
she was the only one who felt the emo in me..
she's really nice,
wanted to take me for a starbucks treat today.
unfortunately..thanks to MR ANTHONY (lao pa) who gort his accounts wrong.
we couldnt go for lunch with the boss and she couldnt treat me.
we waited for the lunch till 3.30pm
cux the boss-es wanted to treat us a meal at tampines.
in the end cux the accounts wrong we couldnt leave
and the treat had to be postponed to after newyr.
in the end we ate our lunch at 3.30pm (x.X)
(-_____-)

sadded`
nana's going back malacca tonight..
wouldnt be seeing her tmr
and wouldnt be seeing her arnd for 2weeks cux im taking leave from 11-15th feb.

something funny happened today.
a customer sent her curtains over for washing
and they're white curtains with star-prints on it.
burt it's so old it's turning greyish-and the prints are fading.
i think the prints were those kind of iron-on rubber prints.
so it's quite fragile especially since they were so old.
and then after wash and drying
the auntie came upstairs to our office and said
"nana, i show u something very BEAUTIFUL."
and then she was like "TADA!" and flashed the washed-curtains.
everyone stoned for a minute and then fell laughing to the floor.
cux after washing, the old curtains were torn with many many holes.
burt the funny thing is.
the holes are all STAR-SHAPED.
it looks like someone use the star-shaped cutter for baking cookies to cut it thru.
and then i said
"now we can call the customer and tell her we've gort her new-styled curtains."
it's hilarious tat all the holes all STAR-SHAPED okie?
LOL.

it's half day work tomorrow
let's hope the kbox outing with qin n shu arrives fast.
i always love it when im with them.

~still waiting stupidly.~

work was crazy ytd..
with the rushing of stuff before new year holidays start.
nana give me a breakfast treat in the morning before work
and told me stuff bout her life.
it was nice of her.
=)
things were fine except i gort pissed off with haoxiang cux he didnt help me out at first.
burt he coaxed me and things gort better in the end.

and then i went to buy my clothes today!
kind of happy cux i gort the dress i saw with qinqin at mango tat day.
it's a sweet dress.
finally i found my new year clothes after shopping for 3weeks.
LOL?

it's sunday and u're gone again.
as usual,
i havent been talking to you.
it's like.. one week and 2 days since i talked to you.
and.. 3 weeks and 2 days since you talked to me.
it's shane ward's breathless on 98.7 fm now.
the artist n song u introduced me.
im thinking of you.
i feel so... helpless when it comes to you.

who could tell me ward to do?
who could tell me how to forget you?

today's work suck to a certain extent.

i shouldnt talk about ward sucked burt yes it's bcux of stupid AUNTIE-joyce and some stupid uncles again.
now i know nort only aunties are bad, uncles are as well.
( i dun mean all thou. jux tat alort of them do. )
basically, i hate the adult world.
i hate this society thing.
i dun wanna grow up,
can i remain a young 18 yr old pls?
burt it's impossible.
maybe when i turn 30 i will get so pissed off with the world the society the HUMAN creature and the turning old and wrinkles and stuff
then i will go kill myself and get reborn as a cat.

yes this sounds crazy burt who knows?
i might get so tired and sick of life i will do exactly tat.

or maybe on HIS wedding day i will do tat.
ah yes eunice goh dun be THAT crazy and stupid and dumb and retarded to kill urself when HE gets married to ANTH girl ok!

look im really crazy to think about these.
im just in one-of-those-kind-of-mood again.

i dun wanna tok bout such pissing-me-off stuff.
burt im seriously, very, super, tired.
my arms are aching like shit,
and tmr's saturday and yes there's work AGAIN.
i cant wait for the kbox meetup with shushu n qinqin.
i hope we'll organise it like SOON burt i know it will be at least after CNY hols.

it's like damn.
lately im starting to feel abit sad again.
im refraining myself ok? i really am trying very hard.
burt i guess im starting to have the "im-alone" mood AGAIN.
bcux nowadays, my beloved frens cant be there everyday to pull me out of the "alone-ness" thing.

nope im nort lonely, cux i know i have my sweetest and closest mates like qinqin n shushu.
burt i reali yearn for someone to be there for me.
i just need someone to be there for me whenever im tired..
to give me a chest to lie on and let me rest from the busy day.
i just need someone to be there for me whenever im sad..
to wipe my tears for me and give me a good ol' hug and tell me he's there and everything's gonna be alright.
i just need someone to be there for me whenever im angry n provoked
to give me a listening ear and pat my head and tell me tat i dun have to bother about such pple.

where is HE?
is it really THAT difficult to find someone who can do all these?
i know of someone who can definitely achieve these,
without me even saying anything he can guess my thoughts.
burt too bad,
he's nort mine.
and i dun think i'll ever have that one-tiny-weeny-chance.

all i ever need is that ONE chance.
you know?
it's been sooo long?
i know if i ever have that ONE chance,
i'll definitely hold onto it forever.
cux after going thru so much and so long,
i know more than anyone how impt you are.
the memories are still so vivid,
it was like yesterday.
burt we're all grown up now,
i cant believe how time flies.
cliche, burt i cant believe why fate abandoned us like that.
no.. fate abandoned me.
why must it be "fated burt nort meant to be"?
i would rather it be nort fated at all.
at least it would not make me hang onto it so much.
why let us be fated burt nort give us a chance?
why so cruel?

i was thinking the other day
if god ask me one day,
to give me a chance to go back to the past,
and skip the day knowing you,
will i want that?
im very determined and my answer will be,
even if i have to start all over,
go back to that day when i met u
and then go through all these all over again,
my answer is still NO.
i would go through these a million times if i could,
cux that would mean i could go through the days i spent with you for another million times.

it was only for a mere 5months or so,
burt do you know, those days with you were the happiest days of my life?

i've never regretted knowing you.
you are the only person i'll never, ever regret knowing.

went out with qin after work ytd!
it was funfunfun!
she was so crazy and i was so happy to see her.
we met at parkway at 6pm+
and then went for meesiam!
qin finally get to eat the meesiam after visiting there for the third time
(the first 2 times the stall wasnt up lol)
she had the sooo contented face when she finally get to eat it lol.
and then we talked and laughed so much we couldnt eat our dinner properly.
hahahas..
and then the guy sitting at the table behind us were staring at qinqin so weirdly when she pretended to cry
HAHAHA..
and we saw this auntie with a super HOT hairstyle
(qin said maybe she could balance a plate on her hair LOL)
i laughed so hard i was shaking and i almost puke out my laksa
in the end the both of us agreed to shut up and finish up our meal first
burt we always gave up and started talking.
lol.

afterwhich,
we went to shop arnd for my contact lens, clothes and toner,
while qin needed to shop for her present, teeth whitener and earphones.
she gave me lots of suggestions on clothes,
and there was this blouse she made me wear at espirit,
and i thought it was nice.
burt i wasnt used to seeing myself lidat so i didnt buy in the end..

i went to get contact lenses and the stupid shop took away my lenses and ask me to come back 20min later for an eye check up.
i just walked arnd like a blind woman and qin was my only support.
and i had to shop for clothes like that.
in the end i have to place the clothes so near to me squinting so tat i can see and i was like some weirdo.
qin just kept laughing and walking here and there to tease me
( cux she was my ONLY support, then i was like "qinqin where are you??!!" )
after tat we went back to the optics and then qin started to fool arnd again.
she said i looked like a cyclops with the optics specs
and then it's like qinqin went arnd disturbing pple tat we duno.
for example.
the guy said i could come back next time and ask for an eye check up again
then qin said "burt her eyes dont want to see you~~"
and then the guy laughed and muttered something i cant rmbr and she said
"burt her contact lenses dont want to see you~~"
then after tat i asked the guy if he needs to take a look at the eyedrops im using n he said ok
then qin said "burt her eyedrops dont want to see you~~"
then i was like (-______-)||
the guy must be cursing inside LOL.
then gort this woman who came in and shouted so loud at the guy
"oh HI JEREMIRE!" and started to ask him stuff
then before we left qin said
"BYE JEREMIRE~~"
and he was like "eh??how did u all know my name??"
burt we just laughed and said bye and left
leaving the silly guy feeling weird how we know his name.
LOLS!

after some shopping,
qin saw me to bedok interchange,
she wanted to see me home burt i didnt allowed
afterall she still have to work the next day.
i dun wan to see my fren so tired ok?=)
anyway...thanks for the dinner-meetup duh.
and thanks for seeing me home
we'll see each other very soon again huh?^^

today's work was fun cux nana came to help
then stupid nana keep irritating me again.
for example.
we were double checking the stocks,
so she's reading out the invoice numbers and im checking,
then it's like: -
nana: "6021"
me: "okie"
nana: "6069"
me: "okie"
nana: "6069"
me: "...okie here!"
nana: "6069"
me: (turning arnd to look at her) "i already said it's here lor! there!"
nana: "6069...the recorder spoil already. HAHAHHAHA!"
me: ".....(-____-)|| maybe if i try hitting the recorder it will be okie again."
nana: "6032....ok already HAHA."

and then i drew on nana's hand writing "IM DOREMON! HUG ME!"
lols...
so funny la. haha.
work's so fun with her arnd.
burt i really dread the work.
(T~T)

imissngqinling
imissngqinling
imissngqinling
imissngqinling
imissngqinling
so happy ngqinling actuali come ask me go gaigai.
cant wait.
=D

imisscheongsiokwen
imisscheongsiokwen
imisscheongsiokwen
imisscheongsiokwen
imisscheongsiokwen
so happy she bought me on human pets lol.

ihatework
ihatework
ihatework
ihatework
ihatework
cant wait to find anth job and get out of this sai gang.

argh! tmr's saturday and still there's WORK!
i wanna sleep kns.
and sat's job is normally SUPER hectic than weekdays.
KNS.
today stupid nana keep hitting my head with the invoices.
( she did tat 5 times seperately. )
and then scared me THRICE today.
pinched me ONCE today.
( cux she said she's cute and i said "hey look the sky's blue" )
blowed into my ear ONCE today.
( when i was talking to a customer on the phone )
and laughed at me when haoxiang smacked my hand today.
( cux he dun allow me to carry the super heavy curtains )
sometimes i really wonder if she's really 30? or younger than me?
(-_____-)
everytime i see nana i will think of ngqinling.
as cheeky as ngqinling.
nana's very nice.
and she makes me miss qinqin.
=(

thanks nana for making work fun.
haoxiang is nice too la,
seriously.
grateful to him to help me carry stuff all the time,
even the light ones.
thank you too.
=)

today's is the end of his two weeks confinement.
shushu,
in the end i still sent ler.
short and simple de.
i think it's impt, cux today's more special than CNY.
so yes, CNY im nort sending.
i think it's insignificant to send for CNY.
this is much more a meaningful n significant thing.
he's online now.
should be super tired.
maybe jux woke up from nap too?
lol i think too much too far.
still.
i dun expect anything in return.
im glad he's back.
even if to him, it shldnt mean anything to me.
burt to me, it means alort.
so well.
im limiting myself alort, and im doin it well.
im glad to be able to achieve this
cux i dun wan to be a burden or watever.
hey, have a good rest boy. =)

so tired today!

after the whole day of play ytd i still must WORK today.
i woke up feeling tired and sleepy
and sleep-walked to my office after a long stand on the bus.
and then sleep-talked to my colleagues+frens
and haoxiang asked me why i look so out-of-spirit
and siqi asked me if i slept late last night.
then i just zZzZz... the whole morning.
and forget some stocks and joyce reminded me.
then i gort so guilty and concentrated on work.

and haoxiang keep entertaining me to wake me up
so at the end of the day i was like laughing until i get cramps hahas!
and so nice! after tat day boss-mak treat us ice-cream,
qifeng treated us tea-eggs today!
and duno-who (i think it's boss-ken) treated us cakes.
yum!
i have nice colleagues =)
burt i really dun feel like working on sia...
work is really so tiring.
burt..hais.
i like the colleagues there
and if i dun work it's so bored.
ARGH!
miss school =(

today's another one of the best day of my life.
it was quite a crazy day,
me and my frens went escape and then to wildwildwet.
and we really had great fun

wasnt quite looking forward to it at first cux i tort escape is laopokpok
burt after going i think,
for a small country like singapore it's relatively acceptable ler.
met shushu at pasir ris mrt at 11.30 (supposed to be 11.15, burt sorry shu, i was late)
then went for lunch at white sands mac.
it sounds silly burt im so glad to eat mac with my close fren again.
since work started all i've eaten is at the food court with my colleagues.
which is SUPER boring.
the same place EVERYDAY.
(-_____-)||
so after tat qinqin reached,
and we acc her to the kopitiam at the top level
soon the rest subsequently came too,
and i was quite shocked to see zarifah wearing a headscarf for the first time.
i keep teasing her tat her scarf would fly to her face during the rides
and if she went WWW she'll turn into octopus.
L o L
im bad so sorry it's jux a joke okie=x

so we went escape,
meeting anna there,
and we went for the first ride which was alright and comfy
so nice i could sleep there
burt was getting abit dizzy n nauseous at the end.
L o L
so i thought "hey the rides aint too scary"
until siokwen led us to the second ride at the "inverter"
OH MAN I SWEAR I WILL NEVER!EVER! SIT THAT RIDE AGAIN
it almost scare the hell out of me okie!
it jux turn you upside down
again and again
i was screaming like mad and keep saying "faster finish laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!"
and then there's this part where they just stop you there
hanging in the air UPSIDE DOWN
my slippers almost fell and i just stepped hard
the blood rushed to my head and it was so uncomfy
and i thought im going to fall,
land on my head straight down with a "BAM!"
and die.
(-______-)
so i jux kept screaming althou i almost choked screaming UPSIDE DOWN.

i will never sit that stupid "inverter" ride again.

after which,
we went to take the pirate ship
and according to qinling's description, they are 4 fcking guys sitting behind us
screaming like sh!t and almost made me n qin go deaf.
and they screamed on purpose. kns.
the pirate ship wasnt tat scary at first, only when it swung the highest
so i grabbed qin's arm. l o l.
and hey, it made me feel so much better duh.
after the pirate ship, we went to take "rainbow"
it was a super nice ride!
nort scary AT ALL and comfy
nice view when u're at the top.
burt zarifah was so scared and her eyes gort red.
err...(-___-)
then i keep saying "zarifah where's ur house?look for it!"
L o L.

and then we went to the haunted house which is SO FAKE.
before going in we were all so scared
then we formed a "chu-chu-train"
L o L.
then there's tis staff guiding behind us,
and making weird noises to scare us every now and then.
at first i was scared by him (cux me and qin were standing at the back of the chuchutrain)
then i was like "ward's tat??!!!"
and squeezed qinling's hand like ward.
then she told me "aiya it's jux the stupid guy la"
then i nort scared liao L o L.
burt the guy was quite good at mimicking ghost wails sia hahas.

and then we went for the go-kart.
it was nice! i drove zarifah wahahaha!
burt we all saw ward a hell-driver jiajia was.
qinqin (who was sitting beside her) was pale like ghost and scared like shit.
L o L!

and then we went WWW!
burt anna n zarifah didnt go.
so the 5 of us had a nice time floating at the SHIOK RIVER ( l o l )
and the bigbig float was great and exciting!
and we oso went to the tsunami which i was so scared i would drown
thank god qinqin was so nice to take care of me all the time.
and then the girls played at the "samsung" thing which i die die dun dare play
so i went off by myself while waiting for them
i went alone to the SHIOK river and met one pervert uncle and two pervert malay ahbengs.
kns.
si uncle! go eat shit okie! dun come here gross n freak pple out.
so old already go die la.
well. dun tok about those things already.
luckily i faster swim away (okok float away ok? -.-)
then went back for qin n shushu.
then we went to sit the big float again
then went to the slides
and they all bully me by dragging me to the pail and pouring water over me
(T~T)
BAD QINQIN AND JIAJIA.
*pouts*
then they still force me go play the "samsung"
i really scared until like shit.
the float go down tat time i really very scared the whole thing will topple over then me n huiting will smash into the wall.
(T~T)
i just screamed and the "splash!"
a big splash of water splash into my mouth and nose.
(-_____-)
then i was like "puipuipui~!"
(-_____-)
stupid huiting still keep laughing at me.
sobsobs (T~T)

lalalala! im so happy today! =D

11th January 2008.
he's gone.
burt thanks, for the sms.
short, burt it really meant alort to me.

hi tekong, bye hinfan.

... ... ...
he's leaving tomorrow,
according to huimin it shld be 7.45am
and im struggling to forget
burt today at work
when i was staring at the calender doing my invoices
with the big "january" on top
with the numbers 1-9 cancelled
with the number 10 circled
and that UGLY number 11 jux sitting there mocking at me.
and my heart soured.
burt i shook it off and concentrated on my work.

it was my first day of work of my whole 18 years of age.
and i was slogged like shit.
checking stocks, carrying stocks, checking invoices for the millionth time
calling pple, checking datelines, taking down stuff.
burt i thought it was manageable,
althou i was aching all over after it ended.
and it was good to have work to keep him off my mind.

i made a decision.
im nort going to contact him anymore.
im leaving his world n relief the burden from him.
i wan him to go NS carefreely.
so tmr..
is the last day of freedom for him (before he goes NS)
and it will also be the last day im bothering him ever again.
it's painful burt i made the decision.
i would rather hurt than let him find me irritating.
i would rather hurt than let him dislike me.
so i feel like shit now.
bcux after tomorrow
im keeping my memories of him shut deep down in my heart.
bcux after tomorrow
i wouldnt remind him of me again.
so after tomorrow... ...
i would be slowly forgotten by him.

i really need someone by me now.
qin, shu, min.
burt they're all busy i guess,
and im on my own.
almost cant take it anymore..
my nephew aka my fren came immediately to me when i told him.
yes, tat 22yr old nephew.
he's so nice. thank god he's here.
and he managed to help me force my tears down.
i hope my decision could last.
i've been falling for fan over n over again.
everytime i said i'd forget burt i'll fall for him again.
i hope this time it's for good.
i feel horrible living in another person's shadow.
yet i feel so much happiness at the same time,
to know tat im living in his shadow.
bcux it's him and nort others.
i feel so worthless.
so dumb.

tomorrow before he books in,
im leaving him a msg.
the last msg.
to say goodbye.
yuen. hin. fan.
a name n person so dear to me for years,
since i was a child.
now im trying, trying very hard to forget this name and this person.
will i succeed? after failing so many times can i?
pray hard for me?
=)

been talking to my nephew on msn today n ytd
althou he's my nephew, he's 22yrs old already
a very nice guy..
today he gave me some advice
"if to you, he is ur motivation, burt to him, you are just a passing cloud that leaves no trail in his heart, why still hang on?"
"one should nort live in another's shadow."
so inspired.
im pondering on these words.
hopefully it will help me.

tis is in response to qin's blog.
it gave me some urge to write smth back. hahas.

all i want for new year is someone who'll love me whole-heartedly n be there for me all the time. of cux, tis someone mux be someone whom i love, too. isnt it jux so simple?

burt life is nort like tat. heaven wldnt even give u this most-simplest thing.
im nort expecting anything. im nort even hoping cux hope gave up on me so many times.
burt im yearning.. yearning so much for something yet so far away from me.
it's unreachable. unachievable.

working for it does nort necessarily means u'll get it.
love dun work tis way.

if only it does.
if it does,
i dun care whether the process will tire me out.. or even kill me
i will jux work for it even if it means my everything.

burt it doesnt.
and i can only content myself with ward's left.
and still working for it.
with a heart that wouldnt give up no matter how much i wished it would.

im jux stating my thoughts.
so nope this is nort emo-ing too.
hahas congrats me i havent been emo-ing today. =)

~3 more days and he's leaving~

today nvr really emo
cux i was so happy to be chatting with my dear qinqin huitingting n huiminmin
after toking to them the heavy feeling in my heart is slightly removed
=)
hms.
he's nort online now eh.
think he's trying to enjoy the last 3 days of freedom he has.
and soon it's byebye to his hair!
LOLS.
burt even if his hair is gone,
still... ... ... =)

kekex.
im trying to maintain my slightly above average mood now.
dun wanna emo ler! =)
starting to dislike emo-ing despite it being my fav hobby in the past.
starting to think emo very painful and uneasy.
so im trying to kick tat habit lo!
YAY!

went for interview today.
dun care ler.
im trying to apply for many many job
see which one accept me.
i wanna work fast!
it will help me kick the bad habit of emo-ing! =)
hahas im abit "self high" now.
despite the fact tat most of my close frens r nort online to tok to me
(-______-)
jux toking to my sec sch senior now.
so actuali kind of sian.
hahas *shrugs*
he still look the same.
and my the other senior is still as good looking.
hahahahahahahas.
no wonder xinrou was head over heels over him in the past =x

argh! im getting bored again.
and he just came back!
burt im NORT talking to him.
he deserve a good rest after playing the whole day
and he definitely needs a good time before he's stuck in NS.
so im NORT disturbing him.
NONONONONONONONO.
*controls myself before i type smth to him.*
ok i btr go offline
before i cant control myself and go kachiao him.
byebye all my beloved frens!
good night!
good night fan =)

im sho. damn. bored.
guess i've to quickly find a job n get occupied before im bored to death.
when i was in hk i was busy everyday
going out n stuff
suddenly being back in singapore feels so quiet.
and..
WHERE ARE MY FRENS???!!!!!!!!!
zzz... ...

he's coming back tmr!
burt anth 5 more days, 11th jan
his going away again
to tekong this time.
(T~T)
sigh~~~~

hi everyone im back to singapore.
hongkong was so so so great.
came back on wed night
then on thurs i jux slept ALORT.
then early morning today at 7.30am i woke up from an excellent dream
i shouldnt say who i dreamt of huh? hahas.
so i wanted to go back to sleep to continue the dream
burt i started feeling DAMN uncomfortable
so i ran to the toilet n started puking.
so yupps. tat's ward i've been doing today.
puke. stomach ache. diarrhea. puke. stomach ache. diarrhea.
oh yes n slept throughout the whole day.
from 8plus to 11am
then went to see doc
then slept again from 12pm to 3pm
eat med watch dvd play my ds lite
then pukepukepuke cux the med effect was over
so went to sleep again from 5-7pm
and the doc gave me a SUPER BIG JAB on my BUTT.
super painful de.
nw my butt feels sore whenever the painkiller effect is off.
(T~T)

still feeling abit nauseous now. argh.

when i left hongkong i was sad.
on the plane i looked out of the window at the country..till it was out of my sight as the plane rose higher n higher.
then a few drops of tears rolled down. burt wasnt obvious.
so i wiped it off.
then i tort of the time when i boarded the plane in singapore.
i was so happy at the tort im flying to where he is.
then now im sad leaving where he is.
burt hey! he's coming back in anth 2 days! =D
i was thinking when i was on the plane.
i felt so at loss n empty when i left hongkong for singapore. and when i left singapore for hongkong.
i hate tat kind of feeling. it's so... ...uneasy.
then i wonder y i feel tat way?
cux of my frens. n cux of him.
so sian.
hongkong's so good i wan to study uni there.
almost didnt want to come back.
burt i missed my frens n all here.
zzzz~~~

sigh. i btr get going. the med's making me drowsy.
so yupps..bye all!

hi pple im back!
im sorry for the late replies n late updates
cux i went to guangzhou (sucky cheeena)
and onli came back on monday.
actuali wanted to come back n blog about how BAD cheeena is
burt im in a good mood today bcux IT'S RAINING HERE IN HONGKONG!!
so im sho happy to wake up to the nice, cold, fresh air
and the drizzling nice rainy view outside my bedroom window
which is jux right in front of my bed.
so yupps im sho happy so i wldnt wanna tok about the sucky encounters i had in stupid cheena.

since it's raining here in hk the weather is turning colder
which is great! seems like this christmas would be a freezy n nice one.
=)
ytd was 19degrees, i guess it's arnd 15degrees now barhs? ^^

im so so so glad n happy to come back to hk
and ytd when i checked my mails, blog, frenster facebk etc
im so happy to recieve all the mails, msgs n comments from my dear frens
thank u pple!=)
u guys certainly made my day^^

tmr i might be going to a "tour" to hk universities
cant wait! hahas!
yupps im going to take a look
then i will apply for both singapore n hk universities
see which is willing to accept me lor lols.
with my bad results i only can wait for schools to choose me,
i've no rights to choose schools sobs.

went surfing arnd the net
hinfan's frenster shoutout says he's sick, mental n physical.
i wonder ward tat means
and i wonder if he's okie.
sigh.
wish i could tok to him n ask him if he's alright.
huimin.
i saw yj's frenster leh
and saw tis photo.
i think u see ler will gek.
if u view his profile i think u'll noe which photo im referring to.
hais~~
we both lead a sad life.
zzz...
any updates huimin?

all my frens reply me fast!!!!
cant wait to recieve ur mails n msgs again!!!!!=D

~currently in hongkong~

hey pple im here to update!
it's nort very cold here in hongkong,
only arnd 17-19degrees
in fact im perspiring if i wore my coat
lols.

day 2:
nothing much actuali
went to pray to my gran uncle ytd
and then went shopping at Sha Tin's New City Plaza.
bought this pair of nice nice jeans at Espirit hahahahas..
it's a black jeans! woohoo love black~
went to Zara also
realised things at hk's Zara is cheaper than Singapore's
and all the shops here (Zara, Espirit, Mango, Miss Sixty, Morgan etc)
have more variety than Singapore.
burt Morgan n Miss Sixty r too ex for me to afford
(x.X)
so onli could buy some at espirit n mango hahas.
onli saw this shorts i like at zara thou.
burt i was too fat (-_____-)
wearing it makes me look like an elephant?lols!
kns.LOLS.

day 3:
then today..
kinda slack arnd
slept till 9am plus
watched tv
then went my house opp tat shopping mall to walkwalk
bought some stuff
and here i am back home blogging.
hahahas.

miss my frens too..
saw this pretty earrings for ting n siokwen =))
=p
i wanna see them sia! and go out to play hahas.
siokwen is everything fine?
qinling...i very long nvr hear from u ler leh
minmin...was ur fren's info accurate?keep me updated on it okie.
(you know ward i mean lol)
and huiting how's the job thing going ler?
jiamin still slacking is it hahas.
aw.
=(
reali miss ya all man.
=(

oh ya.
i realised my phone DIDNT HAVE ROAMING on day 1.
grrr..
burt nvm la
dun think there'll be any impt calls anyway
cux till the day the sun explode the most impt person oso wldnt call me one la.
...

after im here
i keep telling myself to keep my mind off someone
and dun emo when travelling.
yea kind of put him off my mind most of the time
cux when i start to think of him again i'll distract myself with other things
burt sometimes..
when doin little things
like locking the door..
like waiting for the lift..
when packing my stuff..
the image of someone will flash across my mind
then i will shake my head to tell myself to quit thinking.
so i successfully didnt emo so far
hahahas.
burt this morning i allowed myself to emo
early in the morning 9am woke up
i emo-ed until arnd 9.30am
i jux sat on my bed n watched outside the window
at the tennis court n shopping mall across
(the tennis court was a rooftop one tat's y i can see)
then i was kind of idiot
i tort about ward huimin said on the day i left singapore
"i reali reali hope u'll meet him there"
really?
i actuali wished tat i will and wished tat i wldnt.
i guess shushu understands the feeling n why i'd say tat.
well.
one more week he's flying to shanghai alrdy.
dun think i'll see him in hk ler.
maybe it's a good thing?duno la.
wish i could tok to him on msn like in singapore
n could sms him to take care n stuff lidat.
althou it's nort much.
3 days nvr tok to him alrdy.
miss him.

~he's flying away today..~

thoughts n feelings 1:
11:00am.
it's 10:47am now.
13 more minutes and u'll be boarding the plane.
and then u'll be flying off...to hongkong shek lap kok airport.
then 24hours and 25minutes later,
i'll also be boarding anth plane
and flying to where u are.
=)

althou i might nort see u there
im still happy to know tat im standing on the same land as u.
at least until 15dec.
then u'll leave hk
and fly off again to shanghai.

thank u.
for letting me hear ur voice before u go in.
althou it was jux a short conversation
im alrdy contented.

althou i've just put down the phone 10min ago
im alrdy missing u badly again.

when i called u
you said
"haha now u can go back to sleep alrdy =)"
yes, i could hear ur smile.
so i told you
"haha no la..i woke up early"
maybe u dun noe
i woke up at 8am
to wait for 10am to call u?
bcux i was afraid tat i would oversleep
and miss hearing ur voice.
so at 8am
i woke up automatically
and didnt dare to go back to sleep.
i jux laid on my bed.
and then at 9am
i saw tat singapore is going to rain.
praying hard for a good weather so tat u can have a good flight,
i hurriedly went online to check the weather forecast
hongkong's raining today too. 18˚C.
tis means it's going to be cold over there.
keep warm boy, althou i know u're strong n wun get sick easily
still... take care.

when i called u.. u were having ur breakfast
i think ur frens were there to see u off?
i tort i heard naiyu's voice o.O
LOLS
or was tat ur brother?
duno la.
and i think he said (or whoever said)
"tell me tell me say ward?"
(-______-)
or maybe i heard wrongly la.
then u were like entertaining him(or them?) at the same time.
zzz..
nvm la.
can hear u're voice im very, very, happy ler. =D

raining ler..
it still rained in the end.
11:37am now.
ur plane should be soaring in the sky alrdy?
pls pls pls let this be a safe and smooth trip for him.
pls.

``im waiting for you. no matter how long it takes. ``


thoughts n feelings 2:

tis morning
i recieved huiting's sms,
telling me she wanna quit.
serious,
kids like us get bullied in the society.
sigh.
i think it's really better to be a student.
u see,
we get bullied now when we first step into society,
years later,
when we grow up and get more experienced
we don't get bullied as much,
burt we'll still have to face office politics and socialising.
2 things tat i'll hate to do.
the fake masks on everyone.. it's difficult to find someone true.
i dun wanna be fake.
i wan to face pple true n real.
burt u noe how u'll end up if u're unlucky n nort careful?
backstabbed.
maybe im being pessimistic,
burt isnt tat how the world works?
all i can pray now
is tat all my frens, from childhood till now at least
will be my frens forever.
at least in the far future,
i know these pple r true to me, just like i'll be to them too.


thoughts n feelings 3:
jux received a msg from minmin too
telling me bout a news
which made her so sad.
it's okie minmin, dun be sad.
we're in the same boat.
i share ward u feel.
you know we cant control this kind of thing,
so we can only sigh in despair,
upset tat there's nothing we can do about it.
burt hey,
we shouldnt be upset.
bcux we've gort ward she hasnt gort.
years of memories tat she will nvr be able to achieve.
days walked past together,
that she had never experienced.
so cheer up.
when u feel depressed,
turn arnd, look behind
u'll see a whole gallery of good times you guys had together.
and if u feel despair,
look beside u.
u'll see me there,
always here to lend u a listening ear,
and always here to give u a crying shoulder.
=)

im here again.
kinda happy tonite
cux he's back from genting!
burt..
duno if i hurt his heart sia
cux i said my fren saw his pic (wearing the prom suit de)
then he seemed hurt.
he was saying
"i looked like SH*T in tat photo sia!!!"
T.T
then i say "dun hate me..=("
he said he joking la..
burt i still scared he's angry.
T~T

dun angry.
T~T

ytd went marina sq
my fav hangout again
hahas.
then had dinner at "dian xiao er"
mummy's treat
hahas.
then my daddy bought me a x'mas present.
HUGE winnie the pooh !!!!
XD
love it! hahas
when i free take photo of it then upload here
=))
then went topshop
and i saw tis grp of pple
then gort tis guy there
i think look ALORT like my ex.
was wondering if it's him
cux too long ler
i forget how he look like sia =x
kind of spoil mood
burt duno la. dun care oso.
if it's him it's him lor.
who is he?HAHAHA.
*shrugs*

then happy happy
fan reached singapore at arnd 9.30pm last night
then i received the sms
"Juz reach singapore..."
=D
at first was abit unhappy i knocked into my ex (althou im nort sure if it's him la)
burt as soon as i saw the sms i was smiling from EAR TO EAR.
=D
=D
=D
burt i guessed he's tired..so i ask him to have a good rest
and "good dreams sweet night"
hahas!=))

job interview on monday..
hope it's good la!
wish me luck hahas^^

nxt tues's tpjc's prom..
nxt wed fan's flying..
nxt thurs im flying..
happy cux im flying
sad cux im flying
im so gonna miss my frens!
=(
cannort tok to them sia
mail me ok guys?!
T.T
and....
have a good prom minmin n fan!
fan dun worry
u look GORGEOUS in tat suit!
and minmin~
i noe ur prom's theme is "frost" (according to fan)
so u must win the "ice queen" seat okie?!!
hahas =))

okie dokie~
time for bed~
-``*hope i'll knock into u in hongkong.*``-

~everyday's a happy day!~

event 1:
i went out with siokwen ytd
bought quite alort of makeup stuff at the face shop
i love the eye shadow i bought duh.
spent quite alort..
burt the things were super pretty
hahas =)
and shushu bought her prom dress!
yay!
and we sang at kbox for HOURS
the both of us can reali sing hahas
onli the 2 of us and we still exceeded time
so we extended to anth 1 hr
and still couldnt finish all the songs we wanna sing
hahas..
fan's also singing with his frens ytd orhs!
LOVE SINGING!!!!!
LOVE kboxing hahas.
new term by fan.
hahas. =)

event 2:
did my nails today
loves black.
i wanted to try it out
before formally doing it again for prom

here are the manicure i did..
hope it's alright.. give some comments n feedback ok! =)






for thumb


for other fingers

how is it?
i came up with the patterns myself
hopefully it's nice.
asked siokwen for her views
she said it's nice
wanted to ask fan too
burt he's away from keyboard
so well..
tmr barhs.
im so bored now ok.
wan to tok to fan =(
burt he's busy
zZzZzZzZzZz.........
im listening to tat song the hundredth time
lols.
thanks ar siokwen
for getting it from dixon n sending it to me
oh man..
love it
it's damn damn damn nice.
ok i've decided to listen to it for anth hundred times
or more.
hahahas!
i wan to let huimin listen oso!
tat can shut her mouth up for saying tat his singing sucks.
tis is evidence tat he can sing!
he's the best singer among the 3 okie!
hmphs!
XD

event 3:
oh man~~
fan's flying back to hk on the 5th
im flying on the 6th
he still said
"why u everything behind me one day de? lols"
how i noe duh.
(-_______-)
ward shld i say?
if i flew one day earlier
we would bump into each other on the plane AGAIN.
just like 4 YEARS AGO.
when both of us finished sec 2,
going sec 3 the following yr.
duh.

i wan go hongkong disneyland!!!!
i wan to take the ferris wheel!!!!!!
burt i dun wan to do all these ALONE.
cux i wanna go with YOU.
tat's the main reason why after all these years
i STILL haven go to hk disneyland before.
becux i wanna go with .YOU.
NO ONE ELSE BURT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!
=(

burt i guess..
tis is jux a dream tat will never come true huh?
...

k la stop it.
otherwise i'll emo again.
alrdy starting to emo.
think i better go sleep n bury myself in my blankets
before my emo gets worse.
tat's all folks!
good night sweet dreams........
~good dreams sweet night~ (by someone)

~you girls rock up my world!!!!~

event 1:
on 21st november 2007
IT'S THE BEST BIRTHDAY CELEBRATIONS I EVER HAD!!!
with special thanks to-
qinling siokwen anna n janet
and of cux
the other 2 bday girls huiting n jiamin
we had the day at palawan n siloso
early in the morning @ 11am
met the girls at harbourfront
then i realised qin was carrying a few lunch boxes
so i asked
"dun tell me tat's our cake?-.-"
she said yes.
so i was -.-
then she say "no la!lunch la!"
lol
then she even lied to me n ting tat it's vegetarian food
and we believed
(-________-)

so we took a train..then a tram to palawan
played beach ball
and wanted to fly kites
burt the lao pok kite
tore even b4 it flew into the sky
so de ne ne.
burt well..thanks for the tort girls
me n ting were damn excited bout flying the kites
hahas.
so we played beach ball for some time
then settled down for our lunch
were eating halfway
when anna n janet popped out from nowhere
with our CAKE
=D
i tort no cake...cux qin n shushu carrying alort of things alrdy
burt i was thinking
"ok la..cake is nort impt..the celebration is good enuff"
burt nvr did i expect tat!
thanks girls...i know u guys spent alort of effort into planning.
*huggies*

so after the cake
anna n janet went to meet pam at vivo
and we 5 chinese girls took a tram to siloso
and kayak
then at the end
i capsized jiamin alone
WAHAHAHAHAAS
then when she came out
she came to me for revenge
reali dragging me across the sands into water
(T~T)

we even exceeded the rental time and had to pay anth $18
zzz.......

after tat we went back to our shelter
then gort into water!
i cldnt swim
so i was so scared can
jux tat i nvr say =x
then i tried to learn to float with my frens coaching me
and siokwen learning with me too (cux she oso duno)
and there was tis time when
i tried to practice floating myself
and my frens were playing
and i choked quite badly.
i jux sunk and choked.
me n my frens panicked like hell
i tort i was going to "die"
LOLS!
althou it was very shallow onli
(-_____-)
ya i know i suck
>=(
and the seawater taste like ...er!
huiting still said ward
"salty water...cooling"
-.-
so cute ar.

then yupps..
me n shushu managed to learn to float abit
then we went back cux the tide was rising
and showered n stuff
and went back to vivo
had dinner
then stayed at the rooftop took photos with the xmas tree
blowed "bubbles"
then shushu went home
we went arcade to play the 3 puck play
then home
then zzz....

it's really the best birthday i ever had.
=)

some peeks at our beach celebrations:


at the train station waiting for beach train..


jiajia n huiting on beach train..


qinqin n me waiting for beach tram..


the beach tram..


where we're heading..


us on beach tram!


me n ting @palawan


qinqin loner playing with sand alone lols.. @palawan


SHE'S A HAPPY QIN!!! =D @palawan


our names! @palawan


qinqin n her "crocs" @palawan


qin's "crocs" @palawan


our birthday cake!! @palawan


lighting up.. @palawan


on beach tram back to train station @siloso


tingting blowing her bubble! @siloso


qin ting jia n wen!pretty x'mas tree! @vivo


ting eunice jia n qin!pretty x'mas tree! @vivo


ward the hell is tis???!!! @vivo


wen jia ting qin blowing bubbles @vivo


jia n her biggest bubble @vivo


shuwen n her bubbles chain @vivo


qinqin n her biggest bubble @vivo


me n shushu with our bubbles @vivo


huiting n qin's biggest bubble lols @vivo


event 2:
somebody tok to me on msn!!!
and sent me the pic of ward he's going to wear for prom!!!!
and asked for my comment!!!!!
=))))))


event 3:
went back to pri sch today
and saw mr gan
sigh..i miss pri sch
the life
the people
the everything.
=(
went shopping after tat
gort a free new wallet!
lol
a present la.
love it!
it's the wallet i always wanted! =)

HAPPY DAY!!!!!!!
=D
tmr going singing
anth happy day!!!
hahas...
alrights i need to sleep
haven been sleeping much tis few days
and playing alort.
my eyes r closing
my arms r aching
my legs r breaking
ok i know im weak n ah ma ok?
burt reali..
im dying from fatigue..
so good night all!!
muacks muacks muacks muacks
(kisses for my girls)
*snore~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*

~went out with minmin n qinqin ytd!~

we met at cityhall mrt..
and ah herms.
ms late queen was late
so me n qin waited for her
while chatting bout stuff..
well i didnt know i was so honoured n powerful huh
ms late queen took an hour to decide ward to wear
when she's only meeting me.
(-________-)

so
we went marina for lunch
and chat till 2pm+3pm
and then went shopping arnd
marina's topshop didnt have the pants qin wanted
so we went to the wisma outlet
then bought the pants
and went shopping arnd again
trying on clothes here n there
lols.
min super funny
she went forever21 and fell for tis dress
she went in the fitting room
took ages to get it on
and woo!
isnt she gorgeous in tat!
"yupps it's perfect on you, buy it =)"
tat was ward me n qinqin said
so well
ms lim huimin went back into the fitting room
after waiting for ward seems like ages again
the door opened
i thought she's done changing back into her own clothes
burt no.
she opened the door n said
"omg i just LOVE tis dress. it jux looks SO good on me."
.....(-____-)
so i practically screamed
"you took so long inside n u were admiring urself in there??!!!!"
so well i had to threaten her to get changed quickly.
ms late queen is also miss drama-mad queen.
after tat we went for a drink n rest at starbucks
and chatted bout tons of stuff including tat black demon(according to minmin lols)
and wasnt she disgusted when she heard bout all the things he did.
well i guess anyone would anyway.
then we went heeren and cine..
and just shopped arnd
and went to the arcade at cine
we played the game where we played at vivo the other time
qinling's a damn tough opponent
or shld i say
me n huimin were jux too weak.
-.-
yupps.
so tat's my day with qinling,
and huimin -- qinling's new met (mad) fren.

had a great time with them
before i left house to meet minmin n qin i even spoke to fan
it was a happy day for me.
=)

here's a sneak peek at our meet up:



that's me n huimin at heeren's toilet



qinling & her new met (mad) fren.wahahahas..



the 3 of us!



me n qinqin~~

alright!
now i cant wait to go out with them again
=D

tmr's fan's last paper orhs
morning paper
study hard!
i know u are studying cux u're offline hahahas..
jiayou =)
and be careful when u drive
so scary la u!
(-____-)
so dangerous can!
=(

alright
im going to "meet" qinling now
tat's all folks!
=)

~it's one day after the end of A's..~


my feelings and thoughts 1:
YAY A'LEVELS FINALLY OVER!!!!!
...
feeling kind of empty.
lols...(-_________-)

was on the phone with siokwen jux now
and toking about how sian we are.
yupps.. i think human all r retarded creatures.
when u're busy..
u complain about too much work,
too less time to play.
now you have all the time in the world to play
u think there's too much time and feel bored cux u duno ward to do.
humans suck.
in my next life..
i wan to be a cat.


my feelings and thoughts 2:
meeting huimin n qinqin tis sunday.
hurray!
althou time isnt confirmed yet.
burt i reali miss huimin sooo much.
and im so happy tat both my pri sch n jc sch best frens r there
althou the et isnt there
burt..lots of time!
herh herh herh.
=x
want to ask all my frens out
pri sch: minmin, xinrou
jc: qinqin, siokwen, ting, jia & anna's clique
sec sch: meowmeow et & fish!
lols i realised my sec sch buddies all nort "human" LOLS!
(-_____-) sorry being lame hahas.
yay!
miss u guys =)


my feelings and thoughts 3:
read qin's blog jux now
were u "inspired" by me qinqin?
hahahahhaahahs...
burt i am.
so here goes:

im the little baby..who only spend weekends with my parents when i was young.
who cried like hell every sunday night when my parents left me with my babysitter
and the little baby who dun even noe how to talk, burt took my baby shoes and waited at the gate of my babysitter's house for my parents, at friday 8am. (when they'll only come at 5pm.)
the little girl..who didnt have any siblings..and my teddy bears were my only listeners.

the little girl..who gort into a fight in pri3..and caused my good fren to have bruises n nailmarks all over her arms (hahas =x)
the little girl..who always liked to do stupid things like mixing baby powder with water and made dough figures out of it.
and stupid things like putting medicated oil on my feets and pretended i was ice-skating. and ended up making the whole floor oily (i finished the big bottle of new medicated oil lols.)

then tis little girl went to sec sch..
and quarrelled with frens over the slightest things.
(i wldnt do tat anymore. sorry xinrou.)
the little girl whom i think sucks.
for doing such things to hurt the pple arnd her.

so now..little girl is slightly older..
going on to jc..
still as stupid..
she still did stupid stuff like singing and dancing tian2 mi4 mi4 with qinqin at the bus stop (with ting n jia pretending they duno us and siokwen laughing like hell)
she had qinling piggyback her arnd the school every now and then.
and she bites. lols!
and tis girl always liked to hug her frens.
especially qinling & huiting
cux she feel tat she had a group of great frens tat r always there for her.
oh ya.
she always always liked to emo.

so yupps.
tat's the girl u're reading about now.
she's changed alort since then.
for the better and for the worse.
ward bout u?
how have u changed?


my feelings and thoughts 4:
happy~
cux on wed night
i received a pleasant surprise.
actuali it was only a phone call la.
and the conversation was quite retarded
throughout the whole phone call
the thing i heard most is
"STUDY AR.GO STUDY NOW." (x 1000000 times)
burt it reali made my day
and made me mug like no tmr.
and it was funny
"GO STUDY AR.IF NORT NO DINNER.*herh herh*"
i hear u laugh "herh herh" i wanted to laugh out loud.
cux ur laughter very funny lols.
then everytime when i started stoning when i study until tired
ur voice rang beside my ear
"STUDY!IF NORT NO DINNER.*herh herh*"
then i will stupidly laugh to myself
and continue studying..feeling completely energetic.
so i nvr stone or slack orhs!
cux althou i hate studying history
i studied hard, bcux u asked me to do so.
so thank you.
i was able to study despite sleeping onli for 3hours.

been long since i heard ur voice.
so long.
almost a year plus i suppose.

and after tat call till now
i still rmbr ur voice.
it was such a pleasant surprise.
i tort u will only reply me a sms.
when my phone rang
it's reali the last thing, tat i will think tat it's u.
bcux it's been so long.
still..thank you.
u duno how much tat call meant to me
how much it impacted me
and how much difference it made.


my feelings and thoughts 5:
siokwen's nort going hk with me.
sadded.
nobody go disneyland with me alrdy.
=(
ok la.
enuff emo-ing.
tat's all guys.
update tmr lo.

~ 6 more days to play.. ~


6nov was fan's birthday
and my gran's lunar birthday too
so my gran n i celebrated our birthdays together
went to her house on her bday..
here are some photos we took..



from left: my maid, granny, me n my mum

how cute my gran is..hahas..




yupps..glad tat my gran was happy.

so well..
*counts*
26 hours and still counting.
hahas..i dun think anyone know ward i mean
it's alright
i jux wanted to let myself know how many hours it had been.
hahas.
went to check out facebook
wanted to sign up burt i guess i wanna change my email after A's
so maybe till then..
yupps.
cux like ward tim said...i feel tat my email's too kiddy too.
been using tat since pri6..
it's time to change i guess.
been lazy hahas.


was studying econs earlier on
and was searching for some stuff
when my pri6 class photo fell out.
fated?
hahs. why did it fall out.
so i jux gort abit emo
tat's why im here.
(-_____-)
then i was looking thru our faces one-by-one
and trying to figure out the names of every faces
and i realised.. hey i rmbred quite alort
maybe only forget 10+
hahas.
=p


my clique was made up of 3guys, 5 girls.
althou 2 of the guys always bully us la.
and hey i tort we were in the SAME CLIQUE?
>=(


i recalled once,
when me n huimin were at the block beside our sch
playing with the cats
(yes i loved cats since young)
then there was 2 little kittens
a black kitten n an orange-tiger kitten
that we loved to play with everyday.
burt they were so thin..and weak
and was always hungry.
and i rmbr tat stupid WK always bully the cats
and me n huimin always scold him whenever he does tat.
and ya CW oso.
anyway they bully US too la.
lols.
well so tat day as usual
WK come disturb us
so minmin n i were hopping mad
and shoo-ed them away
then fan came and hey! he loved the cats too.
he even bought catfood for the kittens using his own pocket money
(althou his parents dun give him much money)
then huimin n i were amazed
n he told us
"i used to feed the cats every evening in hk,
cux my house there the hillpark alort of cats"
huimin was like so surprised tat a guy wld do tis kinda things.
me too.
burt i guess he wldnt do it now in spore
will kena warning from the police lols.
anyway he's the first guy i know who like cats.
or.... no, who like animals. cux he likes dogs too.


burt my pri6 class was quite big
hms..arnd 32 if i didnt rmbr wrongly?
and yes tat number 33(or was it?) who joined us only on 24th july 2001.
i still rmbr it was a thursday,
the day after our school anni celebrations.
and tat thurs morning
my classmates were all discussing softly bout tat new classmate tat's joining us
and wondering ward would the person be like
we didnt even know if it's a boy or a girl
burt i was hoping for a girl to join our clique hahas
so tat we can outrule the 2 guys who always bully us.
(-________-)
and tat huimin was hoping for a boy so tat she can gossip again.
duh. (-____-)
so we saw our form teacher Mrs Kwek talking to auntie n uncle,
with our new fren silly silly standing one side.
then auntie n uncle left,
and tis little new fren joined our line.
Mrs Kwek told us to be friendly,
and kind of told us he transferred from hk int sch to here.
bcux i was the only one who can speak cantonese
i was forced by everyone to ask for his name.
so well tat's when my nightmare begun.
and well..
since then.

and yes.
huimin realised her hope for a new gossip.
till now.


oh damn i think im thinking further n further.
soon i'll be writing out everything tat has happened btw my pri sch clique
so yupps.
=x
better stop.


yupps i better leave alrdy.
been here too long.
study hard guys~~